Slavic women “in search”, or married but tired of their husbands, often attach great importance to their ability or inability to arouse sexual desire in men. The lust of men is proof of their relevance and attractiveness for such women. Although, as a rule, it is precisely on these points that they feel a deficit in their lives. Let's skip the stories about short minis, inappropriate heels and bright makeup and go straight to the topic of erotic lingerie. This is a weapon that hits the spot. At least, that's what most women think. Like, I’ll put on lace stockings, an openwork belt, a synthetic mesh robe, and my beloved, seeing me in this guise, will immediately be inflamed with desire, fall in love more deeply and pounce on me to take possession, amazed by my beauty and sexuality. The calculation is something like this. For some, however, everything happens according to this scenario. But this is in those cases when the couple ALREADY has passion, the husband is already passionate about his wife, wants her, wants her with or without underwear. But here I am writing about OTHER cases. About when a man lost interest in his partner partially or completely. Or, he didn’t even really light up, he saw in the lady more of a friend, an interlocutor, but sometimes, out of boredom and lack of a beloved woman, he slept with her. A woman sees her partner cooling off, and, having read glossy advice, runs to an erotic lingerie store in the hope that this will excite her lover. But, unfortunately, she gets the exact opposite effect from such an action. In my private practice, I’ve heard a lot of stories from wives like: I put on beautiful lingerie, and my husband said, “Ugh, take it off!” Or - there was sex, but for a long time the man could not really get aroused or cum. And then for several days he said that he was very tired at work, he was busy, and the topic of sex was avoided on his part. Or - the sex was fabulous, several times a night, but then the man disappeared, doesn’t call or write, I can’t imagine what happened. The point here, of course, is not the underwear. And the fact is that the partner is not particularly passionate anyway. Intimacy with his partner does not excite him, does not excite him. Or that was all, but now there is a temporary decline in desire, which can be for various reasons. And then a “sexy” looking partner is not a source of lust, but exactly the opposite - a woman who draws excitement out of a man. After all, all men know that stockings and corsets should excite a real male. And when a not-so-desirable partner puts on all this armor, the man simply feels obligated to conform to this gender stereotype. Otherwise, he risks being called a non-man, impotent, etc. If a man is not particularly attracted to his partner, but he is not indifferent to her at all, then he can literally gather all his excitement and give the lady a sex marathon, so as not to make a mistake in her and in in your own eyes. According to the principle, since a woman so wants proof of her sexuality, so be it, I will satisfy her. But, as a rule, after such meetings a man freezes and does not want a repeat for a long time, because in this case sex was a duty for the man, and his own attraction to this partner will not come soon. I repeat, what happens completely differently in couples where there is attraction and passion. In these cases, underwear can add even more heat to the fire. Therefore, in a relationship when a man is not on fire, it is not the underwear that needs to be warmed up, but other methods, if this is at all possible in this case. And it’s stupid to expect that if you watch for a man in all his fighting glory, this will revive his desire. What methods should I use? Everything is individual. The topic of excitement is a delicate and difficult one. And often it has nothing to do with underwear and clothing at all, although for many, external attractiveness still remains the main criterion for a partner’s sexual attractiveness.