How to learn to make a choice and make decisions quickly and without worries? This question came up in “ask Marina” in stories. Let's think ❤In my opinion, to make a choice quickly and without worries, the first thing is what you need to know and understand is yourself. Yes, yes, exactly myself. What is better for me and what is worse? What suits me and what doesn’t? After all, what is choice? Choice is when you agree/take something and refuse something. How to do this? Here we need to consider different options “if this, then what are the consequences.” Accordingly, if you have identified several alternative options, then what are the pros and cons of each of them? This is where your self-knowledge and sensitivity to yourself is necessary. There are obvious pros and cons, and then there are individual pros and cons. What suits you may not suit others, but you may feel more comfortable. And this can determine the choice. The choice made on the basis of your needs is clear, first of all, to you. And since you are the one who is responsible for it, it is important that it be done sincerely and relying on yourself, and not on your mother, neighbor or friend. This concerns the choice among possible alternatives. Next, let's talk about anxiety. Anxiety, like other feelings, is some kind of information about you and your needs, that is, it is a signal. Often anxiety arises due to a lack of information about something and then we can talk about a feeling of fear. In the Gestalt approach, it is generally accepted that anxiety is stopped arousal. And then it is important to understand what kind of excitement this is and what feeling we are talking about. That is, you need to make a choice and this situation is accompanied by some kind of feeling. What and what do you want in this regard? Anything can happen here if you start listening to yourself and being aware of your feelings and needs. Maybe you are experiencing a feeling of guilt and it is connected with your mother)) or something else. In summary: Anxiety is normal in conditions of lack of information. Choosing after considering alternatives will lead to you giving up something and agreeing to something. From this action will follow and reality will become clearer. Anxiety based on this should decrease. If it has not decreased, then we move on to the point about awareness of feelings and needs in connection with this. To make a choice faster, you need to quickly consider alternatives and rely on yourself when choosing. Self-knowledge is important here. However, let me point out to you, why do you need a quick choice? After all, you can give yourself time to think. © Aitova M.S. 2023 And, if you need support and a professional psychologist in all this, then I invite you to personal therapy. Right now there are places.