You often hear this phrase from clients and clients: - women often talk this way about their husbands or partners; - men call their own sons this way, who for some reason are not even 10 times away from their mother, neither at 15, nor at 40. Why does this happen? How does it happen that in a complete family with a living father, a “mama’s boy” grows up? Of course, the reason for the formation of a “mama’s boy” character is the displacement of the husband from the family. Why this happens, I think, each individual case will have its own story, but all these stories have something in common. As a rule, for such mothers, a child is not just a child - he is the meaning of a woman’s whole life. This is their continuation, this is their organ of breathing, vision, smell, and so on. How can you live a full life without them? This behavior and perception of your own child is typical of women who are not just disappointed in their husband, marriage, and in interactions with a man in general. No. As a rule, with rare exceptions, women raising “mama’s boys” initially form a relationship with the future boy in their own fantasies. In such cases, a girl born will always be unloved, being ideal in all respects, in the eyes of her mother she will still be “defective.” In families where the psyche of a “mama’s boy” is formed, there is no father, even if he is physically nearby. He is emotionally excluded from the family. He has no say in anything. The role of husband and father mentally completely replaces the mother. But she transmits this (consciously or not, it doesn’t matter) to her son. It turns out that the boy supposedly replaces an “unsuitable” husband/father in the house, but learns “correct” behavior from a woman, that is, the way she sees the image of a man. Not Can a normal and mentally healthy woman be a man! She is a woman! It is worth noting that in cases where there is a good reason for a boy to replace his father (the father is disabled, died, left the family), the son matures faster and takes on the functions of the father. At the same time, he retains the status of a son, and he has no need to identify with his mother (to become a “man” in a woman’s likeness); in most cases, the boy is identified with a man from his inner circle. In such families, after a certain period of time, another man appears for the mother, and this is normal. In cases where a “mama’s boy” is growing up in the house, there is no place for another man. He may appear for something, but as a man in this family he is not needed, it is not comfortable with him. And with her son, the mother has mutual understanding, spiritual closeness, common hobbies, and much that is impossible to even imagine. Women raising “mama's boys” are, in most cases, co-dependent people, and for co-dependent people it is important to feel needed, and she receives this feeling from her son from the moment of his birth. Therefore, she can never let him go. As a rule, the mothers of “mama’s boys” endow them with exceptional qualities. In the fantasies of such mothers, their son will grow up and become at least the commander in chief, open his own successful business, earn millions, conquer space and invent a vaccine against all diseases. Well, how can a “worthless daughter” do something like that? Never! As a rule, women raising “mama’s boys” do not live in the interests of the child; they impose on the boys and force them to live out their own fantasies. Fantasies about their different life if they had been born a man. This is why in their psychic reality the daughter cannot achieve something, just as the mother herself cannot achieve this, being born a woman. In most cases, such women do nothing themselves because of the high level of aspiration they have for themselves and for the world as a whole. These are women with pathological perfectionism. A woman for whom it is almost impossible to enjoy life in any other way than by idealizing her own son, and through him, accordingly, herself. After all, it was she who gave birth to such a boy. In this context, motherhood is selfish! It is not aimed at!