When all sorts of troubles happen to us, we experience unpleasant feelings. Of course, it is normal and natural to react with negative emotions to negative circumstances. However! Negative and unpleasant emotions in the same unpleasant situation can be different. And although for some reason we need the entire emotional spectrum and every emotion is relevant, it is difficult to disagree with the fact that some experiences are experienced easier and more productively than others. Conventionally, these two categories of emotions can be divided into “healthy” and “unhealthy.” Unhealthy emotions differ from healthy ones in that they last longer, are experienced more acutely, more uncomfortable, and their experience is less constructive, not helping, but hindering getting out of an unpleasant situation . In turn, healthy emotions are distinguished by the constructiveness and rationality of thoughts and actions. The occurrence of healthy and unhealthy emotions depends on the habitual way of thinking. Unhealthy problems often arise from the habit of thinking in extremes and inflexible patterns. Healthy ones are more likely to arise when we think more flexibly, contextually, and based on our personal preferences and values. Healthy and unhealthy emotions are related like two sides of the same coin—often an unhealthy emotion has a healthier equivalent (and vice versa), and also both relevant in similar circumstances. Here are a few examples: Anxiety and worry Both anxiety and worry arise in the event of a real or imaginary threat. However, anxiety is cognitively accompanied by an excessive overestimation of the threat and an underestimation of one’s competence in the current dangerous situation, which is why anxiety begins to increase. At the same time, attention begins to actively search for new potential threats, even where there are none. At the behavioral level, such methods of coping with troubles as avoidance, the use of superstitious rituals or psychoactive substances, as well as the search for those who can calm down are launched - in a word, all activity is aimed at avoiding the problem and stopping internal tension. Worry differs from anxiety in a more realistic assessment of the threat and one’s competence, which is why thoughts about danger do not begin to endlessly feed and multiply. In turn, at the behavioral level, danger is not avoided, Because of this, more constructive solutions are being taken to eliminate it. This happens due to self-confidence and a real assessment of the threat with which something can be done. Shame Regret A common motive for shame and regret is the public disclosure of some personal or even shameful information. As with anxiety, shame differs from its healthier counterpart by being overvalued. Overestimating the shamefulness of the information disclosed, overestimating the disapproval of others, and even overestimating how long the consequences of disclosure will last. Attention is directed to seeking outside disapproval, and behavior is often aimed at self-isolation, aggression, and refusal to restore social connections, even if the initiative comes from others. Regret is similarly associated with public disclosure, but the assessment of this event is much more realistic. Social connections are not interrupted or ignored, and attention is directed to seeking confirmation of acceptance from others, rather than rejection. Resentment and frustration Both resentment and frustration arise in a situation of undeserved negative treatment from others. However, a feeling of resentment arises in the case of confidence in indifference on the part of others, thoughts of one’s loneliness and uselessness, as well as the life rule “I will not take the first step towards reconciliation.” This position often leads to the cessation of important social contacts and aggression towards oneself and others. But annoyance does not imply confidence in one’s uselessness and loneliness, and unpleasant treatment from another is recognized, but does not imply that the other is indifferent to what happened. Thus, social connections are preserved and the opportunity remains to reveal your feelings.