From the author: Reflections on psychological infertility and more...More information in the contact group “My Orange Pregnancy” A girl who has been dreaming of a child for several years. There are thoughts about the child. There are dreams, ideas. There are tears, emotions. There is also a diagnosis. There are many things that repeat in her life. All this is spinning in a circle - this is not the first round. But the child is still missing. They are planning. This is the fifth year. This is not the first time I have heard a repeating story. Only the names change. - Do you have the opportunity to spend a whole day with someone's real child, for example? - Well, yes. Relatives have children. - Have you ever taken them in alone, without parents? - Without parents - no, never. Not the first girl who dreams of a child for three, five, seven years. But... Listening to the answers to my questions, I thought about the medal. It doesn’t matter which one, but each medal has two sides and these two sides are connected into a single whole. Or is the whole whole represented by two sides. What happens in the life of a girl who has been dreaming of a child for many years? Her life also has two sides, but there is no contact between them. One side of the coin is thoughts moving in a circle. Repeating cycle of thoughts. Obsession. The second side of the coin is the real experience of being with a real child. - But, I don’t have a child! - Not yet. But there are so many real, living children around, screaming, making noise, rejoicing, laughing, running, jumping, throwing toys, hungry and not wanting to eat porridge. You never know what children are like. But you can only find out through real experience of communicating with a child one on one. Friends and relatives have children. Both friends and relatives will be happy to leave their child with you for a while. And at this time, parents will definitely find something to do. And you will have such an opportunity! Find out the second side of the coin called “Child”. Imagining your child, imagining yourself with a child in your arms and what you could do as a mother - all this is not superfluous. But, there is also a second side of the coin that must be picked up before your own child is in your hands. The experience of being with a living child cannot be imagined, it can only be lived. At least for a few hours. Observe your feelings. How do you feel when you are the only adult next to a three-year-old child who doesn’t want to leave the slide, resists, and you understand that if he slides down this slide, then dirty pants will be inevitable. And he tries to jump into every puddle - you don’t have time to dodge, but the baby laughs. You were distracted for a second, and he had already run away. According to your ideas, it’s already autumn and your hands are freezing, but the baby doesn’t want to put on mittens, he breaks out and starts singing a very loud song - no doubt, the residents of nearby houses will definitely hear it. Try to plunge into reality. What will it be like in reality with a child? Perhaps, by putting these two sides of the coin together, you will take not even a step, but a leap, towards your own child. Or perhaps this experience will lead you to some other destination. And this is also a movement. The destination is up to you. Train while you can:)