From the author: From responses to letters from readers of the magazine “Psychology and Me” Three years ago I met a guy and started dating. Six months later he went into the army, I waited for him. Everything seemed to be fine with us, but then suddenly he disappeared for a week. Friends whispered: he’s dating someone else. We met by chance one day and admitted that he loved her. I resigned myself, but called him from time to time, then he began to dial me himself. Once he said that he only needed me, and then it was all over for him. Forgave him. But something wasn’t going well in our relationship; he kept leaving and then coming back. During one of these returns, I became pregnant. He seemed happy and started talking about the wedding, but a month later he disappeared again. I know I got back together with that girl. At first I blamed myself for everything and cried at night. Now there is no. I am glad that a small miracle is growing inside. I just don’t know how to behave with his dad, because my former beloved does not refuse fatherhood? Lesya A. Lesya, on the one hand, your situation is not easy, because you have experienced and, it seems, continue to experience many rather contradictory and strong feelings for the young man, the father of your child. Naturally, now you are puzzled, and it is difficult for you to choose your course of action with this man. On the other hand, your ability to cope with a difficult situation is highly respected. You stopped blaming yourself, calmed down and found joy in the state of pregnancy, which will undoubtedly have the most positive effect on you and your baby. Moreover, you care about building a correct relationship with his father. And this is the decision of an adult. Lesya, I would suggest that you first decide for yourself how you would like to see your relationship with the young man in the future, taking into account that this relationship will only be the relationship between the child’s parents, but not the relationship between a man and a woman. When you yourself understand how it would be acceptable for you to communicate with the father of your child, it is worth talking with him and discussing your further actions. Of course, it is important for a child to have both parents in his life, even if mom and dad are not husband and wife. And, if you and this young man manage to come to an agreement and outline your further actions, then when your baby is born, you, if possible, will share parental concerns with his father and will be able to give your child both maternal and paternal love.