Recently, at the request of most.tv, I wrote a short article about what kind of conflicts there are at school, and what possible ways to resolve conflict situations. I am sharing this material here. When you hear the word “conflict,” you most likely imagine some kind of quarrel, a confrontation between people due to a discrepancy in motives, norms of behavior, goals, and interests. Such clashes occur in every area of ​​our lives, and educational institutions are no exception. In a school setting, these can be conflicts between students, between teacher and student, parent and teacher. Confrontation can also involve entire groups, rather than individual people. In almost every class, conflict between students is possible, says psychologist Marina Kalarash. For example, one student bullies another. Insults, physical violence, discussions on social networks, etc. are used. The offender is smart, strong, and other boys look up to him as a leader. The one who is being bullied is not very successful in his studies, is overweight, is very touchy and hot-tempered, and has few friends in the class. At any hint of self-rejection, he rushes into a fight. The result of a long-term conflict is his refusal to attend school. How can this conflict be resolved? Of course, it is the teacher who has the opportunity to notice such a confrontation at its very beginning. He can listen to both sides, try to understand what interest each child is protecting. The whole class can discuss a similar situation using the example of some literary work, arrange a debate or a game of “court”, where there will be an opportunity to listen to the arguments of each side and make a “fair decision”. Parents are often involved in such clashes. The father of the offended child talks threateningly to the offender, trying to intimidate. He, in turn, complains to his father, who comes with a “showdown” not to the boy, but to his dad. This is nothing more than an escalation of the conflict. In my opinion, in cases of quarrels between children, adults need to be very careful in their interventions. First, you need to discuss with the child strategies for his behavior in situations with an offender, help him defend himself effectively (with words, a creative, unexpected reaction to provocations). It is important to contribute to the formation of adequate self-esteem in him, and then no one’s words will hurt anyone. Recently, there have been frequent situations of conflict between parents and teachers. The reasons are varied. For example, a student’s father does not like the teacher’s teaching and assessment methods. He criticizes the teacher in everything, questions the explanation of the educational material, tries to challenge the grades, passing notes with his son to the teacher, which set out all the complaints. What, then, does the father convey to his son? “Don’t respect the teacher, don’t trust what he teaches.” Who wins in this situation? Parent. Who loses? No, not the teacher. Child. He argues with the teacher in class and refuses to follow both school and academic rules. He is not interested in class, at school. What to do in such a situation? Here it is important for both the teacher and the parent to understand what each of them really wants. It is important for dad that his son receive a good education. It is important for a teacher to be respected and valued for his education, competence and work. Both have the right to have these needs met. Confrontation will not allow them to get what they want. The way out here is to discuss with each other the possibilities of meeting each other’s needs, without infringing on anyone and without making the child hostage to the adult conflict. It happens that the teacher is in a hidden conflict with the student. Most often, such a student demonstrates behavior that is unacceptable from the teacher’s point of view (disobedience, motor disinhibition, impulsiveness, etc.), is constantly late or does not bring school supplies, does not hand over money for educational aids approved by the parent committee, is unkempt and unkempt. view and so on. Upon closer examination, it may turn out that there is actually hostility.