1. Losing contact with your feelings Often what pushes us to overeating is a lack of understanding of our own feelings and emotions. When negative experiences arise, a desire arises to run away, to distance oneself from them. But if feelings once appeared, then without a reaction they will not disappear on their own. Negativity will accumulate and gradually affect our body and well-being. What is important to understand about feelings? All feelings, even negative ones, are needed by each of us. Behind any feeling there is a certain signal that is important to recognize. To decipher this signal, I must first realize what feelings I am experiencing at the moment - name them and accept them. Take, for example, envy - many consider this feeling bad, shameful and try to get rid of it as quickly as possible. But envy tells us that some of our needs are currently not satisfied, and it is necessary to take steps to at least partially satisfy it. Guilt is a complex and difficult feeling, but it also carries important information. Guilt says that we have violated personal moral rules, and that it is necessary to learn a lesson from the current situation. We can analyze our actions and prevent the situation from repeating again, or we can review our set of rules and change them so as not to experience a constant feeling of guilt. Why do we run from our feelings? Yes, because we are afraid and consider them wrong. But there are no wrong feelings - and most likely these are not even our thoughts, but certain attitudes that came to us from the outside. For example, in childhood, parents may have said that envy is bad. Or they were constantly punished, thereby causing a burning feeling of guilt that I just wanted to get rid of. And just like that, contact with our feelings could gradually disappear, which is the key to a successful relationship with ourselves. When we don’t want to understand the reasons for our condition, there is a desire to get rid of negative feelings and switch to something else. And food helps us with this. It gives fleeting relief, satisfaction and allows you to forget about problems for a while. But such a strategy only distances you from understanding your emotional states and reactions. Establishing contact with feelings is what will help you avoid eating emotions and experiences. How to establish contact with feelings? 1. Track your feelings throughout the day and write them down in your Diary. Be aware of what is happening to you in the moment here and now. You can use Robert Plutchik's wheel of emotions as an assistant.2. Find acceptable ways to express feelings. We remember that feelings definitely need an outlet. You can write about feelings - and this will already be a way to respond to them. You can express them through the body - any sports, dancing, yoga, various bodily practices, etc. Cry. Just do this consciously, understanding what exactly you are crying about now, and what feelings you are experiencing. Any creative manifestations - drawing, modeling, sewing, singing, etc. Be alone and think about what is happening now. Enjoy a moment of solitude with yourself. Talk to someone who is ready to listen to you without judgment. If negative feelings are associated with a specific person, then talk to him. But the conversation should not be about that person and his bad behavior, but about you and your feelings. Don't blame, don't criticize, talk only about yourself and your vision of the issue.2. Lack of positive emotions When we experience stress and we lack positive emotions, our body strives to somehow balance this state. And one simple option is to eat something tasty. This creates a strong bond: if you feel bad, you can eat and you will immediately feel better. The problem is that in any stressful situation, we begin to choose the easiest way associated with food. It is important to break this chain and find other ways to gain positive emotions. Think about what else brings you joy, besides food - what makes you happy?the eye really lights up. Find something you enjoy doing. It can be anything - a walk in the fresh air, fiery dancing, chatting with friends, drawing, etc.3. Lack of awareness of actions When your soul feels bad, before you put a piece of food in your mouth, stop for a minute and answer honestly: Why do I feel bad now? What feelings am I trying to suppress? Will food help me now? And will this effect last? What do I need at this moment? What do I really want to do now? If you realize that you now need support and care from your loved ones, then ask them for it. Talk about your wants and needs. If you feel like screaming out of worry, just scream. If you want to express complaints to a person, write them on paper or put a chair in front of you, imagine that same person on it and express everything that is boiling. If you want to beat someone, beat a pillow or go to the gym. Don’t hold back your feelings, don’t keep negativity to yourself and don’t eat your experiences. Give vent to your emotions, but do it consciously and effectively. 4. Lack of energy Any stressful situation requires a lot of strength and energy from a person to cope with it. When we are nervous, worried, angry, upset - all this devastates our internal resources. And if we were not in particularly good moral and physical condition, then stress can provoke a loss of strength and exhaustion of the body. And our body strives to replenish energy through the simplest way - food. At the same time, we begin to consume mostly foods containing “fast carbohydrates.” They mobilize the body, but the effect quickly wears off, and to maintain energy you have to eat again and again. When you realize that you lack energy, then first of all you need to understand where your vital forces are drained. Identify those very holes and patch them. We often spend a lot of energy on self-criticism, on “chewing” situations from the past, on grievances and doubts, on comparing ourselves with other people. Change your focus from mistakes to your successes, from people's shortcomings to their strengths, from the past to the present, from resentment to forgiveness, and so on. If you are currently in a stressful situation, write down possible steps to get out of this state. Try to look at the situation from the outside, find positive aspects in it and learn the appropriate lesson. And at the same time start moving on. Maintain a balance of take and give in everything. Do not neglect rest - energy appears only through high-quality recovery. Sleep and physical activity are essential components of good health.5. Lack of attention and support Often the reason for eating emotions and problems is a lack of attention and support from significant people. Sometimes we all need someone to comfort us and tell us that everything will be fine. If you need support, just ask for it. Tell us about your feelings, emotional experiences and how important attention from loved ones is to you now. From childhood, we may be ingrained in the belief that we must deal with all problems ourselves, and that we can only ask for help as a last resort. But these beliefs are ineffective, and they work against us. If you feel bad, tell us about it. If you need help, ask. Food often replaces comfort and support for us, but at the same time does not bring the most important thing - peace of mind and tranquility. Instead of such substitution, just think about your true needs and ways to satisfy them.6. Internal conflictOften, excess weight hides a serious internal conflict. Being in a state of constant contradiction with yourself is unbearably difficult. If the psyche cannot resolve the conflict, then the body takes over this function. When a woman begins to gain weight, the conflict resolves itself. For example, a wife wants to cheat on her husband, but is afraid of destroying the family. This is a serious internal conflict that she cannot.