Revision of expectations in psychotherapeutic relationships One of the important tasks of a psychologist is to revise the client's expectations from psychotherapy. A person decides to go to a psychologist and does so because... feels that he is at the limit of his emotional capabilities. Maybe,. therefore, he initially has impressive expectations from the psychotherapeutic relationship. But psychology is not magic, and a psychologist is not a magician. After all, working with a psychologist requires effort, time, dedication and a desire for change (as V. Tsoi sang: our hearts require change). After all, problems and inconveniences that have lasted for years cannot be solved in a few consultations. Often people go to a psychologist as an expert, a kind of “parent” who knows better what to do and what to do. At such moments, the client steps into the role of a child in an adult body and invites the psychologist to do all the hard work and make important decisions for him. Indeed, in this case, the client has the option that if something goes wrong, he can blame the psychologist for not making the best decision. And I think that it is obvious that this cannot happen. To do this, the psychologist initially finds out the client’s expectations from consultation, psychotherapy, and in the first sessions explains in detail to the client what to expect in psychotherapy. This may, in some cases, sound like - I will work as a consulting psychologist or analyst, and not as an “expert problem solver”. We can highlight some points why this happens. 1. Because you need to follow your own rhythm. Yes, a psychologist may be counseling a couple and think that the smartest decision would be divorce. But some people need to maintain such relationships for some reason. Therefore, the opinion of a psychologist can be a solution for a couple, but not at the very moment when clients are not ready to take a step. Each person has a different pace to adapt to reality, this rhythm should not be forced. By then, a person has gained experience and collected data, which allows him to make a more conscious and informed decision. If the rhythm is forced, then it is likely that the person will later regret their own decisions, blame themselves, or not take responsibility. Therefore, the role of a psychologist is to help you understand what is best for you and what you really want. Also, to help you analyze the experience from a more objective and separate perspective.2. Because you need to take responsibility for your decisions. One of the main goals of psychotherapy is usually the development of an internal locus of control, so that the client takes the reins of his life into his own hands. If a psychologist makes the decision, this will not happen, the person will still have a locus of external control, which means that he will not grow with psychotherapy.3. Because you need to understand that there are no good or bad decisions. There are only your decisions, which will probably be the most suitable depending on your experience. Anyone around you can give you advice, but since they haven't "been in your shoes" and, above all, because they won't be living your life, you are the one who can decide what he wants to do. Part of the job of a psychologist is to make it clear to the person that if you move forward in life, you need to make decisions. The role of the psychologist is also to eliminate the fear of mistakes and failures, because it is almost always possible to change course. Every decision is just an experience.4. Because it's very likely that you don't respond well to advice. It is true that a psychologist, as an experienced specialist who is more savvy in human relations, often sees beyond what the client himself sees. However, this does not mean that he knows what is best for you and does not have all the answers, because the most qualified person to make life decisions is you. Additionally, it is likely that the advice of a psychologist will make you angry or feel insecure, simply because you need to go through a number of changes and you are not ready yet