Perhaps you have heard “why are you so/so prickly”, “you’re like a hedgehog”, and so on. What is “prickliness”, what do people mean when they tell you that you not the same/not as it is “normal”. This often happens in adolescence. It is understood that “prickliness” is when you defend yourself where it seems that you are not being attacked. But in fact, you would not be defending yourself if you were not attacked. The point here is that the reaction to an attack is fear. Fear that they will attack me, that they want something from me, that they will criticize me, that they may call me names, humiliate me, accuse me, and so on. Everything is so, but until you allow it to be, it will not be so. At least for you. And here we are talking about boundaries, self-worth. The fear that they will attack me or want something - appears when I know that I cannot always protect myself. To do this, you need to build your boundaries in such a way that it is comfortable for you, and not for anyone else. And we are not talking about those situations where it is unsafe, but where everyday life is. Most likely, you do not notice how some other person is invading your zone of personal space. This is the reason for this fear. Low self-worth can be a reason for rejection of other people. When any unpleasant word can hurt me very, very much. When I collapse from this pain, I don’t know how to cope with it, I suffer. Or high self-esteem - when any word can shake my ideal self. In general, if you protect yourself from people, this is the right decision. I do not want to criticize this defense in any way, I just want to add that the intensity of this defense can be adjusted. If this protection controls you, you are a hostage/hostage of your Self, comfort, happiness. If you manage this process of protection, you build up self-confidence, stability and develop, and you can already regulate how you would like to protect yourself: starting from the banal, but energetically powerful word “no”, ending with sending messages to different letters. The most important thing is that you choose - it’s about awareness. And if you defend yourself, and then it seems to you that it “was too much,” then a feeling of guilt, self-aggression, addictions are possible, and so on - the noose is tightened ever tighter, the process goes in circles. Awareness will help you get out. Here you can turn to a psychologist or focus on your feelings first of all - on yourself, realizing that until you decide to be something, it will not happen. Click the “thank you” button if you liked or found the information in my article useful.