From the author: My only story written from a man’s point of view. My attempt to understand... “Love is something that is not on the Internet. Love is the Internet in reverse. This is when it’s real and close. It’s painful and delicious. When they are angry and forgive. And they think often. This is when there is loyalty and freedom. The night sea. And much more.” Anton walked along the street of his hometown in a great mood. In the evening there was a date, which was almost guaranteed to end in the bedroom. The girl worked as a salesperson in a store next to the university, was charmingly stupid and had rather ripe curves. Nothing pleased him more than a woman's body. His short marriage with a fellow student fell apart a long time ago and now Anton was having the time of his life. His temperament could be the envy of any youngster with the hormonal storm of adolescence. The date was absolutely not pleasing. The girl turned out to be cutesy to the point of indecency. And it was only halfway to sex. At the most interesting moment, she fell into memories and began to sniffle, remembering some Vasya. It was no good anymore - remembering other men in his presence. Even if these are stupid feminine tricks in order to make him jealous. It was difficult to break up. Afterwards he breathed a sigh of relief and headed to his home. My sister was sitting in the kitchen with her feet on the table, drinking coffee. It was pointless to explain to her that drinking coffee at night was not healthy. She could drink it at night, in the morning, in the evening, before and after. In general, Lana was a complete coffee lover. The one who was in a wonderful mood was her! Having admired her slender legs, she lowered them to the floor with a sigh. I knew that Anton would now howl like a wounded bison. It was also pointless to explain to him that such beautiful legs could be placed anywhere. And the fact that she is not one of his fly-by-nights and has more rights was also not discussed. -Will you have coffee? -I don’t like it! -I baked pancakes, will you? With condensed milk and now there’s jam - she dived into the refrigerator. Lana had an extraordinary figure, despite her habit of eating like an elephant. - Why are you at home? I would like to go somewhere. Lana dipped the pancake in condensed milk, took a bite, and, after chewing, launched into an explanation. “Where will I go? My friends are all sitting with their husbands, watching TV, my son is only returning from camp in a week. There’s a ton of work, I’m tired as hell, so I’m sitting here reading a book.” She pulled out the detective story she had started and waved it in front of her. Anton poured himself some tea, sat down next to him and started eating pancakes. He treated his sister with reverence. Although he was only fourteen minutes older, Anton always considered himself almost an elder. Yes, Lanka is not growing up at all. Like in Lyube’s song “my little sister.” Even though she’s already a mother. The one Anton was truly jealous of was her. Because I knew from experience how men can treat the opposite sex. And not for a second could he allow anyone to offend his Lanka. Moreover, she was a more than attractive object. Her sexuality was obvious, and there were a lot of fans. She smiled and sat at home in the evenings with her son and detectives. Anton was secretly happy about this. Let's face it, he was a big owner. He was satisfied with his single life, and his sister, to some extent, replaced his wife: she ran the household, listened to his experiences and events of the day. But lately Lanka has subtly changed. Even the color of the eyes went from just green to dark green. There was a ductility in the movements. And periodically she mentally switched off somewhere. And now, instead of chatting with him and asking about his date, she buried her face in a detective story. But she’s been reading this page for about fifteen minutes. Or doesn't he read? Anton was smart and observant. But he clearly lacked diplomacy. Therefore, having taken the book from her, he asked the question that was tormenting him - “Who is he?” Lana froze. It was not at all in her character to lie and dodge, but to tell Ton the truth... From his face she realized that he would not lag behind and would shake out the truth in the most cruel way. Without taking her eyes off, she answered briefly: “Man.” It’s clear thatnot a woman! Lana didn't smile. She just stared intently. “So, everything is bad,” thought Anton, “if he doesn’t react to humor, it means everything is serious.” Fury quietly boiled in his soul. He already hated this dog in advance and was ready to tear him apart like a hot water bottle. He felt that he was losing Lana, and with her his usual way of life, which suited him in every way. She had already left once, but then it coincided with his marriage. And next to her was Vova, and that explained everything. Vovan was not at all like Anton. He was strong, deeply feeling and very open. With his departure, the era of Lanya’s happiness ended. He died. Four years have passed since the tragedy with Vovka, and my sister still hasn’t fallen in love with anyone. There were fleeting hobbies, once or twice a year. More often than not, they ended on the first date. Lana would come home, throw her bag in a corner, hiss something about a goat, and calm down for at least six months. Vovka was Lana's only love. For all four years this name was banned. She looked at men with that name as thieves who stole her happiness. Cute anecdotes about Vovochka made her incredibly angry. Sometimes she cried at night, and Tone did not dare to calm her down. Vovka truly loved him. Anton even envied him. They were a beautiful couple. A crowd of girls was running after him - he didn’t notice. He was tired of crowds in the pre-Lankin period. Vovka said that this period was about a thousand years before our era. And then it was all over. Harsh and indecent. Vovka was gone, and it was unthinkable to imagine anyone else next to her. The falsehood of other men was immediately clear and Lana did not want to waste her time. Friends sometimes started talking about the fact that they couldn’t bring Vovka back, but the years went by, and we had to arrange our personal life... Lana looked at them as if they were narrow-minded and didn’t even try to explain anything. And now she fell in love. And at first sight. Knowing nothing about the person. Straightaway. Before that, she looked for Vovka in all men and hated them because they were not him. And here... She fell in love. It was very strong and scary. He asked for a date, and she ran off to class. I regretted it later, but I couldn’t do anything about it. I was waiting for his letters, but he didn’t send them. She knew almost nothing about him. Who is he? Don't know. Her brother's voice pulled her out of her thoughts: - Who is he? - I said - a man. - I heard! Tell us everything in detail!!! Anton was angry in vain. And I saw it. Everything has already happened. The only thing that didn’t work out was that she was sitting at home so in love. Why not with him? -Is he married?! Why the hell do you need this?! Are you realizing anything? Lana shook her head in fear; she hadn’t seen Anton like this for a long time: “No, he’s not married.” Was married, divorced. -Wives don’t leave good men!!!! – sparks just flew from Anton. He even forgot that he himself was divorced. “You don’t let me say anything!” “Yes, you don’t say anything!” The lovely evening gradually turned into a major squabble. Anton was seething, Lana was almost roaring, in general, a complete idyll. A phone call saved the situation. Anton barked “Hello” so that they were speechless and could not find anything better than to hang up. The thought occurred to Ton that it was “The One” who called. However, the phone rang again and the voice of one of his young ladies was heard there. “Antosha, cat, where have you gone, let’s go to the bar, sit and dance, okay?” The girl was not bad, but she clearly called at the wrong time. And she was destined to get completely screwed. - To the bar?! Fuck the bar! Why the hell do I need you, to dance with you! I need you to fuck, and everything else... - What followed was pure profanity. Lana watched this scene and did not recognize her brother. It is clear that he needs one thing from the girls, but say it so directly. We need to prepare a speech about Sasha. And she “failed” again. As soon as she thought about him, she became insane. Even the brother’s swearing and bickering with the girl moved beyond the borders of perception. He danced with her. At their office party. The song sounded “The autumn night gave you to me so that I would never see the light again. It’s impossible to understand you, it’s impossible to forget you, it’s very difficult to love you, becauseYou are crazy". He gave her banal compliments, and seemed to be focused on a business trip romance. And she... she was already missing. I almost didn’t hear any compliments and looked at him with all my eyes. “Where is he?!” - the brother was right there. - He left. - Where? - He lives in another city. - They sailed. Anton thought about it. On the one hand, it was good - he left and was nice. Maybe it will be forgotten? Will he go to work? And there, in his city, there are girls. Lanka, of course, is one of a kind, but she is serious about it, while he, hopefully, is not. - I'm leaving to see him tomorrow. - Lana blurted out this phrase and prepared for the worst. “You’re leaving, that means.” And for how long? - For several days. We must return before our son arrives. - Does he know that you have a child? - Yes. - Who does he work for, how old is he, do he have children. In detail.- He is a teacher at the University. Have no children. Twenty-five years old. - He’s also younger?! - Vovka was also younger and by more years. “She remembered Vovka too. I didn't remember before. So everything is serious” - Do you understand that everything is not serious with him?! -You don’t know him at all! But everything is serious with me, but I don’t know how with him. I feel good with him. I have a sea of ​​energy, And then it’s still not clear with him... The next morning there was only a note on the table. Lana didn’t even want Anton to accompany her. She left. Martha appeared suddenly. She opened the door (she had her own keys to Anton’s apartment) and fumbled for the switch. The light flashed, and she shuddered when she saw him in the kitchen. “Why are you sitting in the dark?” Anton smiled: “I train my eyes to see in the dark.” But Lanka is gone, she left. She has LOVE! - Love is good - What do you know about this? - I know. I learned to see in the dark a long time ago. “What are you talking about?” “About you.” Anton froze. The conversation was going completely in the wrong direction. He began to fuss and immediately ran to put the kettle on. Martha was silent. And it was absurd to ask, “Will you have some tea?” Once upon a time, not so long ago, they had an affair. She even confessed her love to him. But he decided that this was from the section of women's whims. Martha then obediently stepped into the shadows. I became friends, he got new girls. And now this conversation raised the topic of their relationship. And it looks like we'll have to talk seriously. He felt that he was becoming very small, almost a child. He wants to run away, hide from adult life, from responsibility for this woman. From the woman I've been waiting for for a long time. But it would be better if she were there, far away. And he would sometimes think about her, that if he ever got married, Martha would become his wife. In the meantime, you can be cheerful and frustrated, yell at Lanka, and meet a new girl every evening. Marta looked at him and was silent. “At least I started crying, by God. It would be clear what to do, otherwise…” thought Anton. And fatigue fell on Martha. “How long can you think about this man? Wait for him, take care of him if possible, be madly jealous of all these sluts. I'm tired of it! She is not his all-forgiving mother. And now he is spinning like crucian carp in a frying pan. Tired, very tired. I'm tired of crying into my pillow at night. And every day is a holiday for him!” She stood up. She put the keys on the table. She interrupted his indistinct muttering: “Here are the keys. I won't come again." Anton seemed to have hit a wall. "Like this? Why won’t you come again?” He was always sure that Martha would come. “But what about…” Martha smiled: “I can’t humiliate myself anymore, all your friends are laughing at me anyway. They can’t understand why I give up other relationships for a man who will never grow up. Of course, I am warmed by the thought that someday in twenty years we will be together. But I'm not ready to wait that long. I’d rather build a family, raise children, and then in old age, when you’re tired of your pioneer childhood, we’ll meet and be together.” Anton got angry. “Well, go ahead, since you don’t need me!” She didn't object. She turned around, walked to the door, quickly opened it and walked out. The lock clicked, and the keys remained forlornly lying on the table nearby.