What do good, caring parents very often do now? They develop the child: they enroll them in tutors, and the little ones in developmental studios. Older children go to sports clubs, to music school. And they are left with absolutely no free time. Now there are a lot of such parents and such children. What does this lead to? Find out the reasoned opinion of a psychologist. I often come across the situation that a child is brought to a psychologist and the parents cannot find a time when the child can visit this psychologist. Because there are simply no “windows” between clubs, tutors... And mom asks: “Maybe on Sunday? On Sunday he only has one tutor.” In fact, such children often become clients of psychologists. Overloaded with developmental activities, they, having a wealth of knowledge and educational skills, lag behind in development and in other important things. Parents say about their school-aged son: “Give him free time - he’ll be on the computer all Sunday. He doesn’t want to play, or read, or go out with friends.” Or maybe, from early childhood, the child was taken from one developmental studio to another, then from circle to circle, he simply did not have time that he managed himself? And he simply did not learn to manage his time. I'm used to not knowing what he wants. Because managing your free time is development. And I didn’t learn to communicate. A child is not born with the ability to communicate with peers. For it to develop, he needs to communicate a lot with his peers. Because communication is also development. And I lost the habit of playing early. If all the toys were taken away from a child (“He’s already big, we need to put all the toys away somewhere, donate them, throw them away...”) So he has forgotten how to play. And play is development. Let's look at all this in more detail. FREE TIME IS NEEDED FOR MENTAL DEVELOPMENT The main way of understanding the world is different at different ages. And for a long time, it is not at all important for a child whether the letters are shown to him. If they show it, why not? But you shouldn’t take his toys away. The older the child, the more complex his games. And not only because he had already “developed mentally” somewhere and this manifested itself in the game. He develops mentally because he plays these games. FREE TIME IS NEEDED TO DEVELOP THE ABILITY TO COMMUNICATE How does a child under three or three and a half years old play with another child? He took something away, or came up and touched this child, or hit him on the head with a shovel. Starts to interact. He might come over and treat you to something. These are very simple steps. And when parents don’t let another child hit or take something away from him, they show him how to share, they teach him to communicate. And then the game greatly complicates and develops this interaction. It is very important for children to play with each other. Because in the game they learn the rules by which others live. If a child is “loaded to capacity” with all sorts of clubs, tutors, sections, he develops mentally or physically, but not psychologically. The ability to communicate, to notice how another person feels, and to understand how to react to it does not develop. The ability to make friends, cooperate, negotiate. Later – the ability to fall in love and communicate with the opposite sex. These “staring contests”, then how to approach and speak... This all happens in informal communication. Don’t delude yourself about school (and various clubs, by the way, too). There is very little free communication at school. The school is organized and structured with lessons. And the child needs his share of communication outside of school. Overworked and under-communicated children often have trouble standing up for themselves. They either often give themselves offense or are very aggressive. There are problems with approaching and making acquaintances. Or there are constant conflicts, and the child does not understand why this is happening. Because the development of communication did not occur. FREE TIME AND FREE CHOICE ARE NECESSARY FOR THE DEVELOPMENT OF INDIVIDUALITY And in the end, the child’s individuality is formed in free time. Nowadays it is very often called creativity/