She sat in front of me: a beautiful, well-groomed woman, about forty. Elegantly cross your legs and keep your back straight. She looked at the floor, only occasionally raising her eyes and as if checking whether I was reacting to her words. “We live wonderfully.” Everything is. We can afford anything. Travel, a beautiful home, any things. Teach my son in England. I'm happy. Relationship with your husband? Beautiful. He is a very calm person. Never screams or swears. He loves his son very much. Plays with him, goes for walks, takes him on trips. Of course, when I'm free from work. He has a very responsible post. Sex? Normal... Almost.. Last time? When we flew to the Brazilian Carnival. About five years ago. Do you think something is wrong? But I asked my friends. Everyone lives like this. He puts a lot of effort into his work. He says that he has a lot to do.........Young. Successful. On a probationary period in a branch of a foreign company. Sell, sell. Prove that you are successful, that you can... At the end of the year, bonuses and a car... He sits and chatters incessantly. He wants help to become even more successful. - The workload is, of course, large. They require a lot. But they give a lot. All conditions have been created. There's even a gym at work. So there was no point in going home. But of course I go. My wife and I rent an apartment. Sometimes you come home: you think, now there would be something romantic, but there’s dinner, everyday life... And there you want to relax... Some people have “tanks”, some have a TV... and somehow there’s no time for that anymore sex. You're already thinking about going to bed. Finally getting enough sleep is one of my dreams. How different. But the problems are somewhat similar. In at least one area, for sure. And there is only one source of problems. The desire to be successful. I see such people in my office every day. Or I hear it on Skype. Those who have sex once every five years, and they live normally and consider that they have a family. Or young people come. Now they are 30 years old. They get married, give birth to children and become not men and women, but fathers and mothers who spend all their time on children. They deny themselves everything and have no time for themselves, for their feminine and masculine affairs, for their relationships. And they stopped experiencing orgasm. Increasingly, clients are signing up with me who cannot experience an orgasm, cannot relax, cannot have pleasure. This is probably one of the problems of modern society. Not in terms of demographics. And the inability to be yourself, to enjoy communicating with a loved one, with your loved ones. The inability to experience joy. Then they ask me: why is this, what happened? People try a lot - some roles, costumes, play role-playing games, but all this does not help, or helps very little. As in the joke about balloons: They look like real ones, but there is no joy. I think one of the reasons is that our society demands to be the best, the coolest, always moving forward, achieving something. But this is contraindicated for sex. There you cannot be the best and the very first. There you need to focus on yourself and your partner, but we are so used to running somewhere, defeating everyone and perceiving other people as opponents that we have long forgotten what partnerships are. And we cannot communicate with our loved ones, giving them something from within ourselves - we are always trying to take something. This comes from society, television, radio, people around us, our superiors, who say: “Come on, come on, achieve it!” We have long forgotten our own goals. We are running somewhere, fulfilling other people's goals. It’s as if we all have an external observer who looks at us all the time and evaluates us. Well, it would be nice if he assessed us well, but he evaluates us poorly. He scolds us all the time. And even when we have sex, even when we want to reach some peaks of this pleasure, orgasm, it’s as if we look at ourselves from the outside and think: “No, I did something bad again, I look bad here, what’s wrong with me?” “It’s not right, I have folds there, an ugly pose, the wrong expression on my face, I need to fix this somehow.” We always look at ourselves from the outside and forget what we are like from the inside. We…