You need to grow into a thought. My short practice as a consulting psychologist allowed me to notice that not every person who turns to a psychologist is ready and has an internal need to change something in their life. And if you think about it in more detail, you can see different expectations of clients from psychologists.1. The desire to speak out is probably inherent in every person who comes to a psychologist. Most likely, this may be due to the fact that a person simply has no one to tell about what is going on in his head and soul. Therefore, after a person fully pours out his accumulated experiences to a psychologist, he feels internally relieved and ready to move on. By and large, the psychologist is not even given the opportunity to formulate the essence of the request, not to mention therapy. The person leaves in complete illusion that it helped and for some time lives in pleasure as much as possible.2. The desire to “cry into your vest” and receive approval and support. This most often lies in the lack of attention and participation on the part of loved ones. Therefore, there is a need to cry to at least someone, just to have pity and say: “You’re doing great! You’re doing everything right! They’re so bad, they don’t understand you! Keep it up, move forward!” After these words, a person feels better, because he again finds support and incentive to continue living, despite such a heavy burden of life. Of course, we are not talking about a change in life position here. A psychologist is needed as a “free ear” for pouring out one’s misfortunes and nurturing self-pity.3. The desire to learn how to influence other people (manipulating loved ones for one’s own benefit). In this case, a person is too focused on himself and his needs, and often views other people as a means of satisfying his desires and realizing his own goals: “I want them for me...” The possibility of changing the point of view of oneself and the people around him is also minimal except in cases where the psychologist manages to draw attention to the benefits of a more sensitive and altruistic attitude towards people. Although here too the statement will come through: “It is beneficial for me to be unselfish today, so today I will be.”4. The desire to change your life like magic: quickly and forever. A rather infantile position that reveals a person’s reluctance to take responsibility for his life and actions. The desire to shift responsibility to someone else: “For some reason, this is how my life turned out. I don’t want to live like this anymore. Do something to make it easier for me.” Due to the fact that not every psychologist can also be a wizard, the miracle of transformation does not happen instantly. Sometimes a psychologist manages to show some trick so that a person believes that changes are possible, after which the psychologist has to explain that “you can’t catch a fish out of a pond without difficulty.” If a person is ready to work, then the work will continue, but if not, then “no” and there is no judgment.5. The desire to understand the current situation arises in a person as a lack of skill and experience to act in such situations and find ways out of them. And this, in turn, most often can be a consequence of the inability to listen to the opinions of others, on the one hand, and the inability to be flexible and sensitive to changes, fear of the unknown and novelty. Most often, a person claims that he wants to return what was and does not want to change anything.6. The desire to work with the deep layers of one’s personality is most often found in a person in a state of impasse, the meaninglessness of life. A person comes with a clear or vague feeling of the inevitability of changes in himself. Precisely in yourself. The willingness to change one’s life position, to shift the angle of view on oneself and others even just one iota, really allows a person to create miracles in his life himself with the help of a psychologist. By and large, when coming to a psychologist with even the most insignificant problem, it is best for a person to realize the root of this problem in yourself, even if you really don’t want to and.