For your attention a short free story on the topic “the ability to refuse.” Susie firmly decided for herself: stop agreeing and indulging! Psychologists on the Internet sang almost in unison and in a sobering tact about the importance of saying “no,” about healthy egoism and some kind of personal boundaries. A constant feeling of fatigue and lethargy has flowed through the waves of Suzanne's life since childhood. The girl's mother used the most cruel and unreasonable punishment for disobedience - ignoring. Poor Susie, trying to get her mother to talk, experienced a dark and uncomfortable feeling of guilt. Each time, trying to please her mother, this guilt seemed to disappear: mother made contact, and Suzanne moved away from herself. The girl grew dim inside every year: there was less and less room for her spontaneity, curiosity and interest in life. Striving for the fleeting joy of communicating with people, where she tirelessly offered and provided her help to the detriment of herself, she could not refuse, she came to the point of loss of meaning. ... - Damn it... What kind of coffee do I like? Suze stood at the coffee shop and mentally read the names of the drinks with indifference: none of them made her want to buy it. “Do I like coffee?” The girl carefully strained her memory muscles to find out at what moment she drank it for the first time coffee? Did she really like it? Or is it fashion? Or is it just such a mood now? Sadly wandering home and not having bought anything, her consciousness washed ashore with a mental stream of understanding that it is important to say “no.” “Maybe, for starters, I should understand: what can I do without harm to myself?.. Learn to refuse things that exhaust me... Not only to others, but also... To myself. Don't let yourself get wasted. Don’t let yourself be offended... And gradually try everything again: drinks, food, hobbies, to understand what I want?.. At first it was not easy for her. To make sure that the direction of Suze’s thoughts would not harm her, and if they were true, to strengthen them, she began to consult a psychologist. Changing the area of ​​thinking, feelings did not immediately connect. At the first refusal, the girl returned to the past, when her mother was silent and waited for an apology for her “wrong” behavior. Suze simply refused to finish a report for a colleague because she felt tired and wanted to devote time to rest. But feelings! Memory! - No, Brandon, I can't help you. “I’m sorry,” Suzanne almost cried as she said this. The chilling horror of a rejecting mother was already rolling into a lump in my throat. She hurriedly went to the toilet with trembling hands and stood in front of the mirror: “My girl.” Be calm. I'm with you. The girl began to cry. The body connected. “I won’t let you be ignored.” Now I'm your mother. You shouldn't have felt guilty. You are a child! I won’t let you get hurt.” Calming down, Suze, with eyes hot from tears, hugged herself and said in a warm whisper into her hands: “I am you.” And you deserve happiness. I deserve happiness. Gradually the girl discovered that she wanted to dance and draw, that she preferred tea with cream; loves blue carnations and... Himself. Every hidden desire to learn to say “no” has its own story, and the hidden need for this is much deeper than just being able to refuse.