Changes, betrays, and returns again and again, changes, and so on in a circle. Do you think there are only a few women who are ready to forgive betrayals over and over again? Alas, this is not so - one of the features of the national mentality is the tendency of women to forgive and endure everything. In this article we will talk about how to understand whether it is worth forgiving a man when he wants to return a relationship he has already broken off once. A common story is that we met, fell in love, gave birth to a child, the husband left for his mistress, then returns and, repenting, asks to forget everything and live as before. Women in Russia, in general, have an amazing ability to endure, forgive, hope and believe. And then I remember the words of Mikhail Litvak. - “They say that hope dies last. I would kill it first. Hope is killed and fear disappears, hope is killed and a person becomes active, hope is killed and independence appears.” Mikhail Litvak “How to find out and change your destiny” People, who were happily reunited and no longer faced with their husband leaving, do not come to me for consultation. Those who have had something like this continuation of their relationship history turn to a psychologist for help: after a while, the man again leaves his family or begins to cheat. As a result of the second scenario, the woman finds herself crushed, her already low self-esteem drops, she stops trusting people and expecting something good from them. In order to determine whether it is worth forgiving, you need to understand the following: has the man realized that the harm that he caused to the woman by leaving, does he sincerely repent of causing pain to his loved one (it is important that it is the loved one, you also need to make sure of this). The man moves purposefully towards his goals. He sees ways to achieve happiness for himself and goes to them, no matter what: he went to his mistress - there is more happiness (pleasure from intimate life), happiness has become less. “Okay, let me go back to my wife - I was more happy with her,” he thinks. Returned. Another girl interested him, I’m happier with her, I go to her. Disappointed. He returned to his wife. Everyone, of course, has the right to live the way they want. A question for a woman who forgives again and again - what are you doing here? Is this on the trajectory of the path along which a man rushes in pursuit of HIS happiness? A man sees only his goal and does not notice how people suffer from his actions. He sincerely believes that by returning he is doing his wife a huge favor and making her happy. And only she herself knows that with each such departure from her, respect, her value in her own eyes, falls below the base level. Relationships with such men need to be ended - that's for sure. Even though it is not customary for psychologists to give direct advice, here I will give you direct advice: leave. Work on yourself to cut the thread with which you have tied yourself to this man. If it doesn’t work out on your own, contact a psychologist, but living in suffering for a man who is not worth your tears is a vain and unnecessary sacrifice. You won’t allow yourself to be deceived once again, you won’t give the man the green light that it’s possible to be with you to do this, suddenly he will understand something for himself. Otherwise, he will remain an eternal mummy’s boy, running around in search of his pleasure from one “mother” to another. How can you check if it is not clear whether a man understands the harm that he is causing you or not? How to check whether he loves you or is he just comfortable with you? It’s very simple - let the man knock on the threshold of your house longer. Don’t forgive right away (I don’t know if it’s clear that this means no intimacy, just in case I’m writing - don’t sleep with him until you have received full evidence of his love or lack thereof). Let him conquer you again, and you will understand everything yourself. And the fact that you no longer respect yourself after everything that has happened is a consequence of those unresolved questions in assessing yourself that you had before this man. It’s not your fault that a man is like this – polygamous and without».