Several times I had the opportunity to consult couples in which the man was much younger than his chosen one. Usually the age difference was 8 years or more. The other day I completed work with another such pair. And this gave me the idea to write this article. A client came to me with the following story. Tired of disappointments in relationships with peers, by the age of 27 he decided for himself that he no longer needed a serious relationship, only a partner for sex. My peers did not agree to such a relationship. Therefore, after listening to the advice of friends, he decided to start a relationship without obligations with an adult woman. On a dating site, one lady nevertheless agreed to meet him. Unbeknownst to himself, he developed deep feelings for her, became attached, and began to experience a strong desire to connect his life with her. As they say, “you can’t order your heart.” He proposed, but the lady refused, citing the fact that the difference of 11 years was still too great for her to start a family. He turned to me with the request “what to do, how to get her consent to marriage.” Of course, not only this young man, but also I was completely unaware of what exactly was behind her “the age difference is too great for to start a family". Therefore, I asked him to persuade his chosen one to communicate with me. She agreed, which already indicated that the woman had not made a final decision for herself and could change it. After talking with her, I was able to clarify the motives for her refusal to marry my client. She expressed the belief that this marriage would be short-lived and would end in betrayal and his initiative for divorce due to a new passion. Her words sounded something like this: “He’s probably not serious. It's probably just a whim for him. The guy wanted something exotic and unusual. He plays around and quits. Why does he need to be so old when there are many young and beautiful people around? I wonder how long it will be before he starts looking at young people? Is it worth waiting for this moment or is it better not to even start?” She named the second reason as her reluctance to give birth to another child. It sounded something like this: “I already have a son. I don’t want to go through all these sleepless nights again, diapers, vaccinations, kindergartens, lessons... And he doesn’t have children. Sooner or later he will want me to give birth to him. But I just don't want to. Not “I can’t”, but “I don’t want to”. He will want it. And then what? He will find a young woman who will give birth to him.” From my experience of counseling other similar couples, I can name a number of other reasons that prevent adult women from agreeing to marry a man much younger than themselves.1. “How will his relatives treat me? They will probably be against it and will start trying to destroy our relationship. Sooner or later they can achieve this. So is it worth starting? 2. “What if I can’t give birth to a child for him or the child will be born sick? What will happen then? Will he leave me? Will he find a young woman? Is it worth trying? 3. “I wonder if he’s a gigolo? Maybe he expects me to feed and support him, wash and iron him, and at this time he will run after young girls behind my back? Do I need all this? 4. “Now the age difference is not very noticeable. And in 15 years, when he will still be only 40, and I will already be 53? I'll be old already. And he is in the prime of his life. What if he starts to be ashamed of me, hide me from strangers, and maybe even from friends?”5. “What will his friends say when they find out about our relationship? They will probably make fun of him and say “why do you need this old woman. What if, tired of their ridicule, he leaves me? Maybe it’s not worth starting?” These, and some others, less common doubts, are quite natural for an adult woman. She already has some life experience. She is more careful and more reasonable than before. She doesn't want to be disappointed in the future. Therefore, many adult women do not agree, let alone marry a young man, with a big difference.