I want to share my knowledge and experience of finding a resource in such a difficult psychological situation as undergoing IVF. I will add that I am not only an observer as a psychologist, but I have also been in this shoes myself. “Another unsuccessful attempt... So much effort was spent... and money... For the last two years, I haven’t thought about anything else except pregnancy... Why is this happening to me??? For what? I barely survived the previous flight... Now I’m just going crazy...” Sound familiar? And even if we weren’t talking about infertility, probably everyone has experienced something like this in their life. The whole question is how to cope, how to survive and not break down, how to live after unsuccessful IVF? “I took a test - negative... This is already the third (!) attempt... But in my soul there is just a feeling of hopelessness and not understanding what to do further... I feel as if I almost climbed a mountain and in one step fell again to the very bottom...” Indeed, the IVF protocol procedure is similar to climbing mountains. All strength is thrown, all experiences are clenched into a fist. Most women describe this stage briefly, trying to seem to run past, I would like to dwell in more detail here. Firstly, in order to express respect and support for women who have chosen this method of treating infertility, who have 2-3 protocols, and some 8-10. You need to have a lot of courage to decide on IVF and even more not to give up and try again and again. Secondly, the protocol is not just a few days of preparation, it is real stress for the body. First of all, this is hormonal stress, due to taking certain medications, and secondly, it is psychological stress. I will not go into detail about what happens in the body during stress. Quite a lot has been written about the importance of these processes, which is abundant on the Internet. I will say that mobilization of the body, triggered by stress, helps to go through numerous injections and puncture, which is an operation and is performed under general anesthesia. During the protocol, as a rule, these are the 2 most emotionally charged weeks, a lot of energy accumulates in the body, requiring release and response . This energy is contained in strong emotions, which at the stage of mobilization are not realized and are repressed into the subconscious. Many people talk about fear, and they separately highlight bodily fear, such as the fear of interference in one’s body, similar to a child’s feeling before a meeting with a doctor in a white coat. And another fear, the fear of remaining infertile, which arises, as I assume, as a result of blocking the vital need for procreation. Which in turn is close to the fear of death. But this is a separate deep and debatable conversation... “Today I found out that the flight... I can’t convey how I feel... It seems unbearable... When will this all end?!” Experiencing a failed attempt is very close to experiencing grief or loss. Pain, despair, anger, hysteria, apathy, emptiness - all these are not the most pleasant experiences, but they are part of our life and they belong at this point. Any of us knows that lamentations and crying will not turn back time and will not give the desired result , but that is not the purpose of grief. The very expression of feelings, emotions, tears is important, which subsequently makes it possible to continue living. Blocking the release of accumulated emotions, stopping them from living in the future becomes fertile ground for the development of depression. If expression is restrained, then vital forces are also blocked, apathy and indifference sets in. One thing struck me, I felt this in myself and have heard this more than once from clients, this is the experience of their powerlessness. During the protocol, it is easy to convince yourself that everything is under control - tests, frequent ultrasounds, consultations and experience of doctors, hourly medications - all this creates the illusion of control over the world. However, the process of implantation and development of the embryo itself is not yet subject to medicine. And it is at that moment when failure occurs (there was no implantation or a frozen pregnancy) that it suddenly becomes clear that there is a secret, a secret of God, which we cannot penetrate and.