From the author: this article can be read in the current magazine for women “OsobaYa” They are greeted by their clothes, but they are seen off by their minds Proverb. When my students working in my ABC of the Family program reach the topic “Functions of the Family,” I give them the opportunity to analyze and speculate on the topic: why such family functions exist, why are they needed, and what will happen if this function is in the family? will not be. One of the functions is called “Status”. The explanation for it is as follows: “Every person raised in a family receives as an inheritance some statuses close to the statuses of his family members. This, first of all, applies to such important statuses for the individual as nationality, place in urban or rural culture, etc. In class societies, a family’s belonging to a certain social stratum provides the child with opportunities and rewards characteristic of this stratum, and in most cases determines his future life. Class status changes due to human efforts and favorable circumstances.” Children answer the question “why is this function needed” in different ways. But, in the end, children themselves come to the conclusion that this function is necessary as a certain threshold in the antispam system. Everyone understands perfectly well that a person who grew up in a family where there were no financial problems had more opportunities for self-development, for example, than a person who grew up in a family where there were always financial difficulties. This is neither good nor bad, it's just a fact. But it is also a fact that in our society there are a lot of people for whom money is not a way of self-development, but simply a way to have fun. And, unfortunately, there are a lot of such people. It is clear that in this case, people who have financial well-being will try to “not let extra people into the system.” And that's okay. Another thing is that sometimes among the “heaps of garbage” something worthwhile can really appear, some kind of nugget person, but not from that environment. It is clear that no matter how good this nugget turns out to be, it doesn’t matter, first of all they will spam it, because it is not from that environment. In fact, it’s a very shame that you, such a good person, were “rejected.” But here it is simply important to understand: there is nothing personal in the antispam system and it was not you personally who were rejected, but the conditions in which you grew up, i.e. an obvious fact that cannot be argued with. After this realization comes, understand for yourself: how important it is for you to be in that other environment. If it's really important, then understand that it will take a lot of effort. After all, they will check you at every step. You will have to integrate into this system, i.e. study the characteristics and habits of all participants in the system. After all, we humans love it very much when we are treated with attention and respect. At the same time, it is worth understanding that servility is annoying, and respect for others is built on self-respect. In human history there are few, but still there are examples of happy misalliance marriages, for example. But at the same time, everyone still knows very well that they were happy only because two conditions were met: Both participants in the relationship were interested in this relationship, i.e. together they “withstood the blow” from those who really wanted to prevent the misalliance. The one who was in the least favorable conditions at the beginning of the relationship tried to fill this gap by developing his BRAINS. No one has canceled the fact that a person inclined to self-development is the greatest value in any society. Another thing is that they don’t accept it right away. But I tried to explain why. And here I would like to recall a quote from the film “Office Romance”: “Nothing is impossible for a person with intelligence.” Good luck to you!