From the author: Original article on Since childhood, we have become accustomed to admiring brave warriors on television screens, the courageous actions of movie heroes, and the dedication of real personalities of the past and present day. How to explain the fact that some people manage to overcome the basic instinct - the instinct of self-preservation? What makes a person do selfless acts? Is it good and for whom? There is no doubt that these are features of upbringing. The moral principles instilled by our parents in childhood remain with us throughout our lives in the role of conscience. She slowly gnaws at some, doesn’t let someone sleep at night, and can even throw someone under a tank. Or he is silent - which is also an option. Let’s try to figure out what is normal and what is pathology. Life in society involves giving up a certain part of freedom in favor of this very society. This is natural and does not raise objections among most members of society, because people have historically sought to obtain security guarantees. Reasonably instilled moral norms do not allow a socialized person to violate the personal boundaries of another, as well as to violate his own (healthy self-esteem). Any decision in the life of a mature person represents a compromise (between selfishness and altruism, for example). Not everyone will agree to sacrifice their own life or health “for the good of humanity.” Why? It is likely that it is again a matter of the degree of expression of dedication and the ability to objectively assess reality. “Can I afford to refuse for the benefit of my interests or can I not, because... I’m tormented by my conscience.” The child begins to understand the world with himself and his family. The fact that the world exists and who he is in this world will be told and demonstrated to the baby by the closest people - those who are next to him in his very first years life. It is in this place and at this time that his future attitude towards himself, his sense of his place among others and the attitude of other people towards him will be determined. The role your baby plays will become the main one for him. “The world is not only built in the nursery, but also destroyed from it; here not only paths of salvation are laid out, but also paths of destruction.” And now, let's try to return again to the concept of “SELF-DENICTION”. Exactly in this form. A child who is rejected as a child (or not fully accepted) has every chance of becoming a selfless adult. Now, instead of parents, conscience forces an already independent adult to reject himself. Is this good - a rhetorical question. It's up to you to decide what goal to strive for. And, if the reason for this is always the same - rejection, then the consequences can be different: from mild overwork and disappointment to the development of psychosomatic diseases (Joan of Arc - these are extremes). If you are forced to constantly solve other people’s problems and this distracts you from solving your own, if living someone else’s life has become the norm for you, if your body asks for rest, but you cannot afford it for yourself (and it), it’s time to think! An experienced psychologist will help you set your life priorities..