Club "Own Practice" Part One The club "Own Practice" began its work. And today I want to write a post about the path that we all go through. About its significance and value. It is clear that, having become helping practitioners, we also go through our own pain points. We have been editing our stories for years, dismantling and putting ourselves back together. Many have deep and serious experiences behind them. Growth and development, often through pain, despair and loss. Searching for oneself, studying, experiencing various states and an incredible number of transformations. As a rule, this path is thorny, prickly, full of tests of varying complexity. But he reveals to us a huge number of gifts, thanks to which we can help people. And while we live, our journey continues. And at a certain stage of this journey a client comes to us. This is where many of us sometimes have high hopes. Not only that we can help a person (although, of course, this is paramount). But also that he will also help us. Finally he will see, appreciate, recognize everything that has been awaiting a kind look and response for so long. Our many years of experience, a long journey to the knowledge that we have now, our dedication to help. He will see and appreciate how much we had to experience before we became what we are. And he will say: “A wonderful person, a wonderful specialist, so much experience and knowledge, so much kindness and sensitivity!” He will write a rave review and tell others about us. And then we will be happy... But for some reason nothing like that happens. The client comes to one meeting and never returns. Does not leave any feedback. The long-awaited group, which we mentally assembled a long time ago, is not recruiting. But we hoped so much, and most importantly, we tried so hard... Why such injustice? But for nothing. It’s just that something completely different was important to the client at that moment. When a client comes for help, it’s important for him not to evaluate our experience (although there are those for whom this matters), but to get from point A to point B. But it happens that when In this we place personal expectations and hopes in it. I gave this example in a previous post. What are these expectations connected to and why are they sometimes so incredibly strong? But in this way our own “blind spots” are “highlighted”. Perhaps we were once ignored or devalued by those closest to us. And now we cannot fully appropriate the entire path that we have gone through. And we unconsciously expect the client to correct this for us. But he came for a different purpose. And in such states, the world often shows the opposite: when you hope too much, everything seems to shake your hopes even more. This happens not only with clients, but also with husbands, lovers, employers, colleagues, etc. So, you ask, it turns out that our personal experience has no value for clients at all? No, that's not true. The more personal processes you have worked through, the more doors you can open for your clients. Therefore, your experience is not only very important, it is worth money. How much - everyone decides for himself. The fear of adequately evaluating your work also “highlights” a lot. In particular, the fact that we doubt our own abilities, which is why we wait for feedback from clients with such hope. But no one should pay for our personal therapy, for meeting our childhood expectations, for our deficits and “blind spots”. But people can and are willing to pay for our help in solving specific problems. So, your own path is important under any circumstances. And you need to try to appropriate it completely. Thanks to this, we will be able to help more people. Better quality and more efficient. Treat yourself more freely and with care. We will continue to work on these and other tasks in the “Own Practice” club».