Working with people, I noticed one interesting feature long ago. If a person works on himself, changes something in his life, it can be difficult for him. But this is not much harder - it is much more difficult to take the first step, to get out of a situation when nothing changes in life. The most unpleasant thing about all this is that a person can take some actions to get out, but the effect may be zero. I recently prepared a newsletter about this, I want to share with you.------------------------------------- ------------- “Hello! Unfortunately, I have no reason to be happy. It's kind of the opposite. I am 38 years old and still not married. I don’t even know where I can meet. If there was a relationship, it was very short-term. Is it really worth waiting for anything? I'm just at a dead end. I want a family and children (I don’t even have anyone to give birth to).” "Good afternoon! Olya, I have nothing to share with you, relationships with men don’t work out, they quietly leave, I’m 35, I have an adult daughter of 16 years old, no personal life, the usual rhythm of life is work, home, home, work.” Each of my answers had its own nuances and differences, but I recommended that everyone think about the same point. I also suggest you do this exercise if you feel like you are marking time. [/url]Answer yourself the question of what needs to happen in your life so that you can say: “Yes, there is change.” It would seem a simple question, and many are ready to answer it: “I will find a loved one, get married...”. But wait, this is where the trap lies. Naturally, you are striving for these changes, but... what small, barely noticeable changes need to happen for you to feel that things have moved forward? I received answers: - If I finally stopped remembering my ex. - If I started meeting a new man at least once a month. - If I broke off my relationship with a married man. Let's move on. If for some reason these things seem difficult to you now, look at even smaller details: - If my first thought after waking up was not about my ex, but about something else. - If I figured out where I want to go to get acquainted (instead of excuses). - If I had just looked at other men, I saw that they exist. Why are small changes so important? It often happens that you know what you want, but your dream seems so distant and unrealistic to you! And it’s difficult to start doing anything, you don’t know how to take the first step, you’re scared. And you are marking time. And also, what’s the saddest thing, you miss brilliant chances, thinking: “What does a simple smile of a man on the street mean if I need to get married!” No, I won't tell you that maybe your dream has passed. But if you were happy with that smile, noticed it, you would find that men see you, you are attractive... and you would dare to go out somewhere, you would feel more confident. And there... If you feel that nothing has changed in your life for a long time, that you are marking time, come for a consultation, you probably do not notice the chances that life gives you. It's easier to find them together! I also suggest you read Antoine de Saint-Exupéry’s beautiful prayer for small changes. Lord, I ask not for miracles or mirages, but for the strength of every day. Teach me the art of small steps. Make me observant and resourceful, so that in the diversity of everyday life I can stop in time on discoveries and experiences that excite me. Teach me how to properly manage the time of my life. Give me a subtle sense to distinguish the primary from the secondary. I ask for the strength of abstinence and moderation, so that I do not flutter and slide through life, but intelligently plan the course of the day, I can see the peaks and distances, and at least sometimes find time for pleasure art. Help me understand that dreams cannot be a help. No dreams of the past, no dreams of the future. Help me to be here and now and perceive this moment as the most important. Protect me from the naive belief that.