What's good about a person who causes you trouble? It doesn't matter who it is - a hated boss, a harmful neighbor, a nagging mother-in-law, an overly loving parent. When a feeling of resentment overwhelms you, it is difficult to think soberly and calmly choose effective solutions. A conflict situation, like an exam, reveals a person’s internal qualities and resources. Dealing well in conflict demonstrates inner maturity. And touchiness, aggressiveness, depression are indicators of insufficient internal competence. If you feel offended, then you have failed the exam. But that’s okay - since you feel it at all, it means you have time to prepare for the next one. Life provides us with many opportunities to test our maturity. Have you been rude on the street? Are you being squeezed at work? Are your loved ones unceremonious in their relationships with you? Fine! You have the opportunity to practice maturity, sanity and personal maturity. Let's start with the all-familiar childhood fantasy. Let's imagine that in every person, even the most notorious scoundrel, there is a bright spot. Perhaps it looks like a sunbeam, because everyone can have a ray of light. And you can call it a pure corner of the soul, all the best in a person that could potentially be in him is collected here. Look around. Imagine seeing this pure, beautiful place in every person. When addressing someone, address this part of the person. This is a simple exercise, because you yourself have this ray of sunshine of a pure soul. A drunk neighbor is also a bearer of a bright reflection of the soul. And you can treat him with respect if you turn to this bright part of him. A harmful colleague also has a pure corner of his soul, and it is enough to simply “look” at this part of him to avoid conflict. Parents may have strange ideas about what is good for you and persistently try to influence you. Turning to the best, the brightest in them, thank them for their participation, tell them that you are coping as best you can. It’s nothing that doesn’t work out right away. Life provides us with many opportunities to try to become lighter again and again. Professional psychological support will help you clearly see your resources and capabilities and understand how to achieve them. This will open the way to calm and respectful communication with parents, confident and loving relationships with partners and children. Sincerely, psychologist Elena Yumaguzina.