"Money or love?" – the girl asked me a question, as they used to say - of marriageable age. She is from India, she is 25 years old (by Indian standards she is already somewhat late in getting married), from a wealthy family. She is educated, chaste (in India it is impossible to do otherwise!) and she faces a dilemma - she needs to make a choice between two candidates for her hand and heart. You can read about the traditions of finding a couple, starting a family and the almost complete absence of divorces in this country in publications The Prince on a White Elephant: How Arranged Marriages Work in India In general, parents take an active part in finding a worthy match for their daughter, and one of their indispensable conditions is the notorious “wealth.” The parents of this girl are quite democratic in the sense that they still ask their daughter’s consent to get married, and she has already refused two “suitors”, since she did not like them externally. So, now she has a choice: one applicant from very and a very rich family, but she likes it much less than the second one, who has a certain income, but cannot be called truly rich. “A strange alternative,” I thought, surprised by the very formulation of the question. I answered her for myself, shared my thoughts, Which is what I warned her about, since she had to make her own decision. And this is what I told her: Money is wonderful. These are funds with which you can afford a decent life, provide for your children and give them an education, afford convenient and comfortable housing, a good car, beautiful high-quality clothes, healthy food, take care of your health, play sports, travel and in general everything you need. , whatever your darling desires... You need to strive and be able to earn money, treat it with respect, spend it wisely, and not waste it in vain. And, since we do not live in a fairy-tale world, when deciding on marriage, we must take into account the financial aspect, understand how the family budget will be built, what its wealth will be, what prospects for increasing it there are, if it is now small. Family budget: we agree “on the shore.” Family budget: when it was not possible to agree But choosing a future husband, in my opinion, should be a loving person heart. After all, with this person you will need not only, to use cliches, to go through life hand in hand, but also to communicate closely and a lot, hug, kiss, and have sex. From this person you will need to want to give birth to children who are similar to him both in appearance and in some character traits. “I love to love you, dear!” And when a relationship begins with falling in love, then the very nature of a person, hormones influence the lovers were desirable for each other, so that their souls would tremble and their hearts would melt with tenderness. And even in such a situation, living together, various contradictions can cause irritation, misunderstanding, quarrels. It is difficult for me to imagine a situation where a person is rich, but physically unpleasant to me - what is it like to share a home with him, a bed, kissing, having sex, giving birth to him children? “But if you like a person, but you’re not in love right now, you can gradually fall in love with him?” - asked this girl. The idea ripened in the girl’s pretty head that the lack of love could be compensated by the greater opportunities that she would have thanks to this person’s condition. What can I say? Probably, maybe... By the way, in an article about the peculiarities of marriage in India it is written: “Hindus believe that love requires time and effort, and it makes no sense to spend it on just anyone. First you need to choose a partner according to basic criteria, get confirmation of the seriousness of your intentions, and then build a relationship together, “grow love” (while already married). Marriage for love versus marriage of convenience. Marriage for love versus marriage of convenience, part 2. In general, life is very diverse in its manifestations and everyone chooses what is for him. more important. And the Indian girl has not yet made her choice... You can sign up for a consultation by calling +7 916 158 13 08 (Whats App or Telegram)