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From the author: Insanity is when a person uses the same techniques over and over again, sincerely hoping that the result will be different. A. EinsteinWhat are human internal problems from a psychological point of view? These are those situations and events in our lives that we could not cope with in “our” time, in which we failed or from which we ran away, where we looked weak or stupid, those that once scared us terribly live in us in the form of an undigested coma of events. Moreover, what remains in the memory is not what happened, this remains only a weak imprint, but, first of all, the unpleasant experiences that we experienced at the same time. And as soon as we find ourselves in a situation that is only barely externally reminiscent (let alone completely similar), we begin to behave according to the previous pattern. But since last time we were unable to cope with this situation and did not analyze it, then this time everything is repeated again. This is how the experience of failures and the experience of situations in which we experience anxiety and fear grow, situations to which we react acutely emotionally, refusing in advance the opportunity to change our behavior in it. We can say that a conscious decision, a free choice, is replaced by a rigid stereotypical reaction, where emotions block the intellect. To reach another level of life, we need to dismantle this “lump” and move on. But, when analyzing the problem, we often experience internal resistance, which manifests itself in yawning, anger and other externally incomprehensible reactions. And the closer we get to the problem, the stronger these reactions are. But by repeating the same thing over and over again, at some point we actually feel liberation, expressed in laughter, tears or a feeling of relief. And if the problem is not yet very deeply embedded in us, then it happens that by talking about it , we get rid of it completely. But if it has penetrated deep, then, unfortunately, you cannot get rid of it so easily. Truly deep internal problems require, of course, a more complex approach. Our psyche can be compared to an iceberg. As is known, only a small part of it is above water, and the bulk of the ice is hidden in the ocean. Likewise, the conscious part of our psyche, that is, the actions that we perform consciously, occupies only 1-5% of the total volume of the psyche, and the unconscious (actions that we perform unconsciously) accounts for 95 to 99% of the volume. Our psyche has one specific feature: it knows how to displace unpleasant experiences that bother us from the sphere of consciousness, “forgets” them. Why is she doing this? The fact is that every person has an inherent need for self-respect, to maintain his own relatively high opinion of himself. Loss of self-esteem entails negative consequences and deprives a person of the ability to clearly manage his behavior in strict accordance with his goals. We can say that without self-respect, a person largely ceases to be a person. The protective mechanisms of the psyche, and it is they who help us maintain self-respect, often allow us to achieve internal well-being by avoiding and ignoring reality. Psychological protection acts against a person’s will when something greatly threatens his mental balance, his mental safety, and his self-image. When are defense mechanisms activated? The reasons for the need to “turn on” the protective mechanism of the psyche are varied. The main criterion for their significance is a person’s idea of ​​what is most traumatic for him, what his leading needs are. Psychologists believe that the most traumatic for a person is a threat to his “I”, namely, the dissatisfaction of the needs of the “I” for self-affirmation, preservation of one’s own values ​​and a sense of identity, sameness, that is, in internal consistency, as well as a feeling of loss of control over oneself and others. The needs of our “I”, like all our otherneeds, require, among other things, so-called supporting information, which helps to preserve and strengthen ideas about one’s own “I”, its relationships with the world, and other people. If these needs are not satisfied, this is perceived as a threat to the “I”, strong emotional and motivational tension arises - resistance, and the “I”, in defense, resorts to the action of defense mechanisms.K. Rudestam defines this term as follows: “Resistance is an internal barrier that arises in people in relation to possible changes in behavior or in the awareness of significant experiences. Resistance can also be seen as a defense against the stress of development and personality change.” Resistance arises because our problems, albeit distorted, with the help of defense mechanisms, still satisfy the needs of our “I”. Various studies have repeatedly shown that it is important for a person to maintain not so much a prosperous, but rather a familiar, stable image of himself. This very clearly demonstrates the so-called “discomfort of success.” Its essence is that a person who is accustomed to failure, having achieved success, victory, strives to reduce it to a minimum, to devalue it. The need to maintain a familiar, stable image of oneself defeats the need for success. In general, we can say that the deep problem becomes part of our “I”, but part of it is incomplete. And just as some people, the less they feel they are right, the more vulnerable they are, the louder they defend it, so our problems resist change the more. , the more vulnerable they are in comparison with the full-fledged personal formations whose place they occupy. How does resistance manifest itself in various forms of behavior: 1) in the desire to get out of the situation (simply leave the room, not come somewhere, etc. );2) in the desire to change the topic of conversation or especially ardently defend one’s innocence; 3) in the reluctance to talk on some topics, watch certain scenes in the theater, cinema; 4) in a sudden cough, sneezing, yawning, suddenly awakened brutal appetite; 5) in a situation of time pressure - in distraction from completing the main task, inevitably leading to being late, untimely completion of it; 6) in a completely incomprehensible feeling of fatigue that comes from; 7) in causeless laughter, seemingly unjustified tears; 8) in attacks of unprovoked fear and anger;9) in the “slipping” of thoughts, when you need to think about something important, look for a way out of the current serious situation. In each of these cases, an important sign of resistance is that behavior serves as a smoke screen that distracts from the true significance of that or another situation. A look at the problem from the side of consciousness Just as the unconscious influences our consciousness, so a conscious, voluntary desire to change oneself can have an impact on the unconscious. Of course, such actions require certain efforts; they should always be based on will, positive thinking and the desire to enjoy life. It happens that it is difficult for a person to realize his own problems. He may experience discomfort, feel trouble, emotional tension, but due to internal resistance he cannot understand the reason for his own dissatisfaction. In order to bypass resistance, free yourself from internal tension, achieve a state of relaxation and, against this background, become aware of your own problems, you can use special techniques :1) Scream with all your might. Of course, preferably where no one can hear you, or with the windows closed. 2) Play sports or quickly walk down the street. 3) Talk out, share your fear, anxiety with a person who understands and supports you. 4) Ask the question: “What is happening, what's the matter? What annoys me? In this case, you can hit the pillow or bed with all your might. After a certain blow, you will know exactly what irritates you. And when you finish beating, you will feel.

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