Feeling insignificant, incapable, helpless can be one of the signs of cPTSD, which appears after prolonged emotional, physical, domestic or sexual abuse. This perception of oneself stems from toxic shame - a painful unbearable feeling . It is because of this that such people often resort to avoidance. It is difficult for them to build relationships and careers, because impostor syndrome haunts them everywhere. They do not feel their integrity and certainly cannot be proud of themselves. It is very difficult to recognize your merits when there is so much pain and self-loathing inside. Constant disappointment, criticism, which can reach hatred, is another symptom that is associated with an irrational feeling of guilt. The feeling of “I did/am doing something wrong” that appears without any objective reason. How do these feelings differ from healthy shame and guilt? Because there is no way to change something, this makes them endless and unbearable. Toxic shame: I am defective, terrible and this cannot be fixed Healthy shame: I failed the exam, but I’m okay, it happens, next time I I’ll just be better prepared. Irrational guilt: I always do everything wrong, I made a mistake, I’m not worthy of forgiveness, I can’t fix it. Healthy guilt: I have the right to make a mistake, I can do something to correct it and not feel like myself anymore. guiltyAt the same time, an irrational feeling of guilt can appear in situations where a person is not guilty of anything, be inadequately larger than the situation itself and do not have clear and understandable boundaries. As a result, such a person often comes to a point where he is immobilized by feelings associated with the trauma. He cannot begin to take actions towards his realization, because he has a lot of shame, especially when it comes to social networks and the need to show up somewhere, to be noticed. He has too much guilt, it seems to him that in all respects he always and everywhere he is to blame and does something wrong. Therefore, he begins to avoid relationships, even to the point of complete social isolation. He compares himself with others and begins to think what is wrong with him: “I just can’t start living normally.” This feeling is very understandable, because even basic needs cannot be met. PS: I work with trauma in the Gestalt approach. I will help you deal with toxic feelings that prevent you from living peacefully, building relationships and earning money. To register, write here in private messages.