If it weren’t for you! You would have achieved a lot! These are wonderful words from the inner self-gnawing bore that does not allow you to enjoy life, to be “here and now.” Most likely, the child learned this communication strategy somewhere in the family. In such families they don’t know how to rejoice, but they know how to grumble, grumble and be dissatisfied. I just want to ask! What is this statement based on? How can you be sure that it would be, for example, better!? In NLP there is a presupposition that says that a person at any moment in time. makes the best decision in his opinion. That there are no people deliberately harming themselves. And in this sense, it makes no sense to sprinkle ashes on your head. 🤗Another question is that when making decisions, a person receives various feedback, which is not always pleasing. And if something happens, then: it’s a good strategy to draw a conclusion and decide how to act next time in a similar situation. And continue to do what is interesting, what you like!👾 not a healthy strategy: to suffer and blame yourself, worry, blame others, get angry at windmills. This is a subtle question from the field of psychology about: accepting your imperfections, about allowing yourself to make mistakes, and about trusting yourself and taking care of yourself, about being here and now. A person spends a lot of energy “chewing” on his less-than-ideal or frankly disastrous results, instead of telling himself and his self-flagellation: yes, today I did the best I could, but it’s better than yesterday, especially if yesterday there was nothing It happened. It happens that when everything is good, a person is not happy, but is looking for something to find fault with himself! How else to adjust yourself, to push yourself further, to reprimand for what you didn’t do perfectly.🚩And the most important thing is that this is a stable strategy for human behavior. He torments himself, he knocks the ground out of his own feet. He himself cultivates his own low self-esteem and uncertainty.😖 and what’s really sad is that a person with such a strategy praises himself little or not at all. He finds it difficult to accept praise from other people. And when others tell him that he screwed up, he internally agrees. It is extremely difficult to rely on oneself. It is logical that by lowering one’s self-esteem, a person increases anxiety and feeds the feeling of one’s own helplessness. And there is no need to talk about the joy of life at all. After all, how can you rejoice when it’s not right here, it’s not right here? Here he hurried, here he said an unnecessary word, there he didn’t guess, here he didn’t foresee and didn’t spread the straw in advance.... yay yay yay. The inner strict parent will blame, violate and punish for the slightest mistake!!! And how joyless, anxious and tense the background is created by a person with such a strategy! This is a separate song... Friends, love yourself! Rejoice at your smallest achievements - this small joy will give strength for big achievements and add joy to life! It’s up to you to choose! Please write in the comments how you experience your “failures” and “imperfections.”»?