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From the author: From the old (1999) There is such a breed of people - Psychologists Is a psychologist an ordinary person? Is he really a person? What does science tell us about psychologists? What data does she have? We know that movement along the birth canal is accompanied by birth trauma for psychologists. This is reliably known. That is why they subsequently breathe so holotropically, remembering bruises and abrasions on the thorny path. Starting from the first months of life, psychologists are noticeably different from other people. While ordinary children show a complex of revival, future psychologists develop completely different complexes. When all children with They ecstatically suck the mother's breast and go for walks, psychologists feel envy and gratitude towards the nursing breast, secretly wanting to eat it itself. As soon as psychologists acquire independence and upright posture, they immediately alienate themselves in the mirror. In mirrors, as you know, everything is the other way around. And on the back, everyone knows, the butt. By discovering the butt J, psychologists get anal fixation. When ordinary girls play with dolls as daughters and mothers, girl psychologists envy the boys’ penis. When ordinary boys play with cars in the sand, boy psychologists try master the mother and eliminate the father. In science, this behavior of psychologists is called the electro-Oedipus complex. In elementary school, future psychologists always have less developed fine motor skills, and the processes of excitation significantly prevail over the processes of inhibition. This leads to the fact that psychologists remain clumsy and excited for the rest of their lives, which significantly interferes with their communication with normal people. Adolescence is marked by love and friendship, but not for young psychologists. According to psychological science, for them this is a period of intensive development of identity and proactive volitional regulation. But what about desires? – you ask. It is desires that attract young psychologists to the psychological faculties of universities. There they learn for five years to satisfy these desires. And in the end, psychologists begin to understand that they actually have only one desire. From this very moment, the psychologist’s identity is completely formed and he can only explain the importance of his only desire to other people. In fact, this is what constitutes the profession of a psychologist. All.

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