The modern rhythm of life is constantly creating new family models: civil and guest marriages, divorced couples who take turns raising children, independent mothers who take full care of the child. It is no secret that more responsibility for the child is often placed on the mother's shoulders. What to do if the father practically does not fulfill his role? Dad can Difficulties with dad arise, as a rule, where the harmony of relations between the parents themselves is disturbed. Therefore, ideally, it would be worthwhile to figure out whether everything is okay in the family. But in practice, it is quite difficult to solve relationship problems and share childcare at the same time. In addition, the mistakes that mothers make are not always associated with quarrels with their spouse.1. Your father’s behavior may not suit you at all, but you still won’t be able to replace him with double your guardianship. For a child, communication with his father and communication with his mother are equally important.2. You can try to teach your dad to be a dad, but it is wrong to impose on him the style that you consider the only true one.3. It is important not to confuse your complaints about the father’s parenting style and the feelings of the child himself. You may not like that dad's participation is limited to watching cartoons together in the evening, but this may be quite enough for the baby.4. Children should not be drawn into sorting out relationships with dad, whether they concern your personal affairs or issues of upbringing. Well done father! The task of “re-educating” dad from the very beginning may seem difficult and almost impossible, especially since this is not far from the truth. The very idea of ​​instilling in an established adult the truth about the importance of paternal participation in the fate of children is already strange. After all, anyone who voluntarily decided to become a dad should understand this without additional explanation. However, in reality there are many obstacles. Ignoring responsibilities towards a child can be associated with fears of not being able to cope, the lack of good examples of communication with one’s father, the conviction that the role of a father is one of earning money, and everything else is at one’s personal discretion and for one’s own pleasure. In addition, on the part of the spouse, there may be unconscious jealousy towards his wife, dissatisfaction with his role and a simple misunderstanding of the situation. But in reality, all this is quite surmountable. Following certain rules in communicating with dad after a short period of time can change the situation for the better. It is important to learn to distinguish and separate the interest in the child itself and the obligations for his upbringing. You can be a loving father, but not understand how to raise children. There are other examples: too active paternal upbringing overshadows ordinary human kindness and tenderness. How to interest You should not imagine a man as an “evil investigator”, attracting him solely to rein in a naughty child. The spouse's participation should be comprehensive and harmonious, and not involve yelling or punishment. Moreover, if dad has already made a decision, there is no need to cancel it. However, if you see that the father is openly rude or aggressive towards the child, humiliates and insults him, it is necessary to intervene and explain the inadmissibility of such behavior. Under no circumstances should you ridicule the father’s behavior in the presence of the child. On the contrary, a policy of strengthening his authority will help: “Dad can do this and that,” “It’s better to ask Dad this, he knows for sure.” Ask the father not to shy away from answering the children’s questions if possible, because thanks to him the child will really learn about what you don’t know. A sense of self-worth and wisdom is a good motivator. You can find a common activity. It is possible for father and child to go to a museum that is also interesting to dad, and play a game that the father also loves. Even if it's a stupid computer shooter that you don't approve of. If you see that some entertainment is completely inappropriate for the child’s age or is dangerous for him, it is worth talking about it. It is important not to be shy about asking for help in deciding and.