From the author: The article was born spontaneously, but, in essence, is a description of the process of professional reflection, and, in addition, a logical continuation of my previous work on the topic of teenage deviance “Difficulties of adolescence: the forbidden fruit is sweet” An early encounter with death, without reinforcement by positive support from family, friends, relatives and comrades (especially if they are not there) predisposes a child to alcoholism. Naturally: if childhood is like this, what will old age be like? Time passes, but it doesn’t get better or easier. As a result, having discovered the sad truth (people are born and die alone, as an option), some children prefer addictiveness. The example described is something like a sudden empathic penetration into the subjective shadow side of one teenage girl at risk. The trigger for the insight that happened, I believe, was was inspired by yesterday's recent telephone conversation. I called an old friend, and he turned out to be visiting another friend (we all studied at the same school and communicated well even then). As a result, I talked to both of them, and the second one (who came from another city to stay with his beloved grandmother, fix the roof of her house, help with the housework) handed her the phone. Surprisingly, I also know my grandmother - she worked at the same school and gave me a lot as a person and teacher. Be that as it may, all three pleasant conversations touched upon the topic of starting a family and in the end I looked differently at the fact that now is not a family one: - If now is not the time, then when will it come? Suddenly, on the contrary, I lose it; - A mortgage, apparently, is the only loan that fully justifies itself; I remember the words of a friend’s grandmother: - I’m looking at two childless neighbors. They live lonely, gloomy lives, and I believe that I am richer - I have grandchildren and great-grandchildren. This is how existence is multi-layered: the personal is sometimes intertwined with the professional, complementing it. And life is much more complicated and, at the same time, more integral than it might seem. Returning to thoughts about a teenager I know, it’s just a pity that our social system is not effective enough... Not many psychologists know that juvenile justice in our “totalitarian” state comes down to the fact that deviant children are not sent to prison. And in order to take a child away from a virtually dysfunctional family, you need to work hard. Finally, children themselves who find themselves in such a situation, whether openly or not, are often afraid to tell others the truth about what is happening to them. After all, the “snitching” will reveal itself and only get worse. Do you understand? It happens that for a child, loved ones who destroy him are better than none. This is a very subtle and implicit point, but important, it seems to me. Well, may gentlemen narcologists forgive me (and commercial narcologists may not forgive me), in real practical life, basic diagnostics for toxic and narcotic substances has its own problems and limitations. The same spices and other fashionable “synthetics” are not detected by standard diagnostic tests. As a result, the narcologist throws up his hands, and social work specialists risk being left with their noses regarding the actually recorded incident. I will also express my subjective opinion. A number of psychologists in the relevant literature defend the view that values ​​can be plastic and change over time. I cannot agree with this vision completely, since values ​​are certain constructs, regulators of a person’s behavior and interaction with himself and the world, expressing his attitude to what is happening. What becomes a value for a person (and not just valuable for a while, say, until an urgent need is satisfied), remains with him until the end of his days. Another thing is that priorities and opportunities may change with age, that’s what I think. Let me emphasize for those who are so attentive to their work that they are in no hurry to label a teenager as “deviant”: in a number of cases, alcohol and the use of other psychoactive substances turns into a meaning-forming value in life, this is true. However, it is useful to remember...