In my last article “Everyone has their own story inside...” https://www.b17.ru/article/59522/ I wrote that every person’s life has its own difficulties and limitations and they depend on his personal history. As planned, I dedicate this article to childhood psychological trauma. Every child experiences various events in his life. Some of them turn out to be psychological trauma, while others remain just events. Psychological trauma is an event that changes the child’s psyche. As a result of psychological trauma, ideas and attitudes may change. Let me give you a small example: A five-year-old girl ran home with the words: “Dad, the neighbor boy told me that I am the most beautiful in the yard.” She joyfully circled around her dad and admired herself in the mirror. Dad was watching TV at that time and, without taking his eyes off the TV, said in a dissatisfied tone: “You’re a snotty cheesecake, and not the most beautiful.” Since then, the girl is sure that she is not beautiful even if someone tells her about it. She doesn’t believe her reflection in the mirror either. And she believes that no one can truly love her and consider her beautiful. Instead of the idea that “I am beautiful, good, beloved,” there appeared “I am ugly, my appearance causes discontent among others, you cannot trust anyone, especially those close to you.” ". Later, as the child grows, these ideas, like moss, grow on these ideas, others, also traumatic: “No one will love me like this, everything they say is not true, because I am a nonentity.” Difficulties arise in building long-term relationships. How to understand that a child has experienced psychological trauma? The child regularly refuses the same activity, resists it in active or passive ways; Experiences strong feelings of fear, shame or guilt “unreasonably”; He regularly finds himself in a situation with similar circumstances, although he tries to avoid it - retraumatization. For example: Rejection in childhood by the team is repeated in his student years, and then in adulthood, all around the person encounters a “bad attitude” towards him. As a child, the father drank and used physical violence against his daughter; as an adult, the same thing is repeated in her family, the man raises his hand against her. The psyche strives to complete what was not completed in childhood and tries to complete it again and again. When In this case, the same event may or may not turn into trauma for the child. So when does an event that happened to a child turn into trauma? 1. The child does not have enough care, understanding, parental attention, communication and friends. He is lonely and sad, but something important is found, and then something happens to this important thing. For example: A child with a lack of parental attention and communication gets a favorite toy with which she spends a lot of time, plays, shares her joys and sorrows . The toy becomes her “best friend.” Mom considered this toy old, dirty and dirty and threw it away. At the same time, she did not pay special attention to this fact and the child’s experiences. 2. During this event, the child experiences strong feelings: anger, anger, resentment, helplessness and confusion. And with these experiences he is left alone, with no one to share and express them with.3. If the trauma is associated with those whom the child trusted (mom, dad and other close and dear people), then the concepts of intimacy and love are associated with the trauma. This is facilitated by violence, mistrust and misunderstanding of loved ones. After all, if those closest to you, those who should love and protect, inflict pain and violence, then your own security and faith in your “goodness” disappear.4. If someone doesn’t appear to protect the child and restore justice. Or does not admit his mistakes and wrongness.5. If no one gives the child the opportunity to express his strong feelings: anger, disagreement and indignation at his insults, wounds, humiliations.6. If no one assured that this will not happen again. Carrying out violence in one's own family against one's own/191/