I'm not a robot

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I'm not a robot

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Privacy - Terms

reCAPTCHA v4
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All children behave aggressively sometimes. This is completely normal. What should parents do if they want their child to express his aggression more constructively? 1) Do not judge the child for his anger. This is the first recommendation. It is necessary that the child does not think that he is bad if he expresses aggression. 2) Encourage what the child says about his anger. We tell the child “ALL PEOPLE ARE ANGRY. AND YOU TOO. It's good that you said you don't like it. But you shouldn’t roll on the floor, I don’t like it, and I ask you not to do that again. You can throw the dice, but only at the sofa or the wall.” But all these words make sense only when the child is already calm; during an angry outburst, all words are useless. 3) Use active listening. This is a reflection and acceptance of the child's feelings. “I SEE YOU ARE ANGRY,” I SEE YOU UPset.” Moreover, it is worth reflecting not only aggressive feelings, but everything “you’re pleased”, “you like it”. 4) Talk about your feelings - “I’m angry”, “I’m unpleasant when you...” This is how the child learns to talk about his feelings .5) Keep your child naturally active. Allow him to run, jump, enjoy life. After all, one of the child’s needs is free, joyful play. Play with him - fight with pillows, for example. Encourage your child to express his emotions clearly. This is very useful.6) Do not refuse unreasonably. Think about it - are you sure you can’t give what he asks? And if you refuse, then always state the REASON. Not just NO, but for some reason - no money, I’m tired, have you already eaten this today, etc. 7) Set boundaries. Clear, unconditional. What is possible and what is not. The child will have an ALGORITHM, he will know what is good and what is bad. What causes disorientation is that the rules are fluid and inconsistent. That is, parents will not react in any way to what they punished for yesterday. Laws will not harm children. On the contrary, they need it. If he cries when he wants a second cartoon, there is no need to turn on the second one. 8) Give warmth and affection. Just talk. Not about business, not about studying, but just like that. Give more hugs. Classic - 9 hugs a day, just like that. Body contact, eye to eye. It is not the best option to advise your child to “go hit the pillow” during an affective outburst. It's just offensive, it's like you're refusing interaction. The child doesn’t really understand why this is. He doesn't see the connection between the cartoons he lost and the pillow. It's better to do this while playing together. In general, this is a channeling technique from adult psychotherapy. She's not for children. It is based on qualitative awareness of feelings. And this is a long and thin job.

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