Feelings and emotions are a certain energy that is released to satisfy a need or as a signal about something: what is missing, what I want, something wrong, somewhere it may be dangerous and etc. Whether we like it or not, our “internal signals” will come. Those. There will be emotions and feelings, but we may not distinguish them and reduce them to tension or anxiety. And if feelings signal needs, then we will stop understanding them, like: “oh, there’s some discomfort inside, I’ll go and sleep.” And the needs will not be satisfied, the discomfort will grow more and more, the tension will increase, and the person will move away from himself.... So, it is impossible to block emotions and feelings! But you can stop “hearing” them and thereby not understand “What I want” and what brings joy. But rather move to the level of constant anxiety or “nothing” - an automatic existence with somatic diseases (energy has to go somewhere). In order to understand how to correct the situation, let’s see how we learn to feel and distinguish between emotions. Emotional energy in a child higher than that of an adult. Children feel everything much more intensely. But sometimes adults retain similar sensitivity. Such people are called vulnerable or sensitive. But the point is that the child learns to feel not only thanks to the strength of these emotions, but also thanks to the reactions of the parents. Through relationships. “I come into contact with you, I feel something in response and I see your reaction, and I react to your reaction.” And also through physical activity, when children “run around”, climb trees - they learn to feel their body, and how we We know through bodily sensations you can find out what feeling is being experienced. Therefore, it is important for children to have contact with adults and other children, where they can talk about feelings without shame and fear. And physical activity is important, or rather, freedom of action. In therapy, they follow the same path: knowledge and discrimination of feelings through bodily experiences, discussion of all feelings with a therapist without shame, and experience in the “here and now” in contact with a psychologist. So, through exercises and therapeutic relationships, a person gradually restores his connection with feelings and learns to understand his real needs and desires. Sometimes, to do this, you first need to work through your shame for feelings and emotionality and attitudes like “emotionality is weakness.” It's all a process and it's all possible! Tatyana Zavatskaya, psychologist, psychology teacher, gestalt therapist. Sign up for a consultation by phone in the contacts section 🧡