From the author: The article was written for the website of the Psychological Studio of Elena Skripka. I would like to dedicate this article not only to parents, but also to everyone who was once a child. As children, we are all afraid of something: Baba Yaga, the dark, loud sounds, strangers. And it happens that childhood fears remain with us for the rest of our lives. In this article we will try to understand what children's fears essentially are, what they are, why they are needed and, most importantly, what to do with them? First, you need to understand what is unique about fear as an emotion. Let’s open the psychological dictionary and see: “Fear is an emotion that arises in situations of threat to the biological or social existence of an individual and is aimed at the source of real or imaginary danger. Unlike pain and other types of suffering caused by the real action of life-threatening factors, pain occurs when they are anticipated.” In other words, the fear experienced by a child is an emotional reaction to a real or imagined threat/danger. Attention - the danger may be imaginary (drumstick, aliens, Darth Vader), but the emotion is always real. There is a feeling that fear in childhood serves a certain function, and this is true. More precisely, when we are talking about age-related (normal) fears, characteristic of a certain period of development and manifested in most children. As a rule, they go away as the child grows older. According to the famous child psychotherapist V.I. Garbuzov, age-related fear is based on the instinct of self-preservation and plays the role of a guard for survival. In a situation of neurotic or acquired fear, the situation is somewhat different, but more on that later. So, let’s return to the child’s normal fears. Each age period has its own “favorite” childhood fears associated with developmental tasks. In the first year of life, a child has a very strong instinctive desire to be with his mother. Therefore, the baby is characterized by fear of unfamiliar adults, fear of separation from his mother, fear of an unfamiliar environment, fear of loud sounds, etc. During this period, responsiveness and closeness from his mother are important to him. If she does not respond to the child’s calls in time and does not take him in her arms, then the baby develops anxiety. This is precisely why experts recommend not to entrust the care of the baby to other relatives during this period, to leave the child for a long time, or to send him to a nursery. Around a year, the child usually begins to walk and actively explore the world. He behaves like an active researcher, asking questions “where?”, “to what?”, “from where?”, “when?”. In the period from one to three years, fear of animals, dogs, moving vehicles, fears of heights, depth, space, darkness may appear - fears that express the child’s attitude towards the unknown world. At the age of three or four years, the child already begins to be interested in the causes and consequences of events and phenomena. The main question of this age is “why?”. The connection between the child’s awareness of his actions and their consequences becomes the basis of fear of the consequences of actions and fear of punishment. Around five years, the nature of fear changes. The main research question during this period becomes the question “what will happen?” " Therefore, the root fear of five to seven years is the fear of death. You can often hear from a five-year-old child: “Am I going to die?”, “Won’t you die, mom?”, “Will dad die?” etc. The peculiarity of the fear of death, unlike the previous ones, is that it may not directly manifest itself. The child talks about the fear of Baba Yaga, Koshchei, an evil uncle, a monster, but behind these fears lies the fear of disappearing from this world. When a child enters school, the focus of fears shifts towards society. The leading fear of a junior schoolchild (seven to ten years old) is the fear of not meeting the requirements of the social environment, of not being someone who is loved and appreciated by parents, teachers, and peers. The derivatives of this childhood fear are usually the fear of making a mistake, being late for class, getting a bad grade, etc. Girls, unlike boys, learn social skills earlierThe norms and severity of such fears are greater in them. But even among boys, the fear of not meeting the requirements of the social environment is not uncommon. The second line of fears of a younger schoolchild is associated with magical thinking, characteristic of this age. It is not for nothing that it is also called the age of “horror stories”. The child believes in brownies, ghosts, wizards, omens, and animates nature. Therefore, fear of the elements, mysterious phenomena, predictions and superstition is often encountered. Leading fears from 11 to 16 years old reflect the physical and psychological changes that occur with adolescents. They are afraid of not being themselves, of losing power over their feelings. Afraid of being alone. But this is no longer the fear of loneliness in the first year of life, when the child is afraid of being abandoned by his mother, but the fear of rejection from significant peers. Thus, each age corresponds to a leading childhood fear, which serves as a natural adaptive mechanism. Parents can help the child cope with it or, conversely, strengthen it. In the second case, they talk about acquired childhood fears. For example, as a result of prolonged intimidation by Baba Yaga, a policeman and other characters who pose a threat to the child. Other reasons for acquired fears are real events (a child got stuck in an elevator, a dog scared him, after a course of injections, etc.); individual characteristics of the child (high anxiety, type of nervous system); increased demands from adults; overload of the child with unnecessary information. As a result of prolonged and unresolved experiences or acute mental illnesses, the child develops neurotic fear. In this case, the best option is to seek help from a specialist. Well, parents can try to cope with age-related fears on their own. First, we will give some “harmful” tips for combating childhood fears. Harmful - because, unfortunately, they do not help the child stop being afraid, but are often used by parents with the best intentions as methods of education. So, if you want to reinforce your child’s fears, then: 1) Be sure to punish him for fear. 2) Scare him more often, especially with non-existent characters (“if you don’t sleep, an evil monster will come and take you away”, “if you behave badly, I’ll give you to your uncle” police officer”)3) Ignore the child’s fears and leave him to deal with them on his own.4) Overload the child’s imagination and imagination with fairy tales and stories that frighten him.5) Constantly remind the child of his fear.6) Shame and ridicule him for his fear.7) Repeatedly leave the child alone in an unfamiliar environment.8) Communicate your fears to your child. Let him be afraid of the same things that you are (for example, starting school). And if you really want to help your child overcome his fear, then: 1) First of all, find out the cause of the fear. It is important to create an environment where your son or daughter has the opportunity to talk about their fears out loud without fear of being ridiculed or shamed. Encourage your child to speak openly; do not interrupt when the baby talks about his fear. It is important to give him the opportunity to speak fully. Remember that fears are involuntary and phrases like “stop being afraid”, “you’re already an adult, but you’re acting like a little one” are more likely to lead to the opposite effect. The child’s reaction to danger will be mixed with shame and guilt because he does not meet his parents’ expectations. Teach tolerance and fear management. For example, a good way is to play with a child in his fear. The game has the opportunity to turn a terrible fear into a funny one. For example, if a child is afraid of dogs, then you can sew a small dog from the child’s old glove and perform a performance in which the parent, on behalf of the puppy, will regret that the child ran away from him. And how he really wanted to make friends with the child. If you are afraid of the dark, you can play as spies who are hiding in a dark shelter (room) from their pursuers. This method works especially well in preschool and primary school..