There is such a wonderful modern word - friend zone. And, as I know, it scares many. They write a lot about this, they worry a lot, they suffer because of this very friend zone. But I don’t understand, Why. And I’ll explain this further. Many create advice on the topic “how to avoid the friend zone, this insidious thing.” But I think, why avoid it if you can simply not contact it or deal with it? For me, this is so elementary that I didn’t even think much about it until I came across this topic again on one forum. What is the main reason for the friend zone? More precisely, not even that. Why does one person end up in the friend zone? (Let me remind you that the friend zone is when you want to love someone, but they only offer you friendship in return, they are such assholes). So, why does this happen? One wants to love, and the other only wants to be friends? Elementary. You are only suitable for this person as a friend, and he understands this, but for some reason you still haven’t made it clear. For some reason I don’t understand, people shift all responsibility for the situation with the friend zone onto those who offered friendship. Here you can to hear something like this: I hoped, but she...;I did everything for him, and he...;I gave her my time so often, but she...Horrible. Yes, you did, waited, expected, suffered for the person. But he just wanted to be friends with you. First of all, being friends is good, it just doesn't live up to your expectations. Sad. Secondly, you haven’t done something for yourself. You most likely forgot that only you are responsible for everything that happens to you. What could be done here? How can one be responsible here? Elementary. Tell the person your intentions right away. Direct, open and honest. Don’t “make friends” at first, expecting that this will change someday, don’t wait for the weather by the sea. A: Telling a person that you are in love with him, if you are; Telling a person that you want him, if you want; Telling a person that you plan to spend years of your life with him, if you do; And so on. Everyone is so grown up around us, but this maturity has taken away that childlike spontaneity that helps move mountains. Remember, while you wait, the one who knows how to talk about what he wants takes everything for himself. For example, me:) You may be refused once, twice, three times. But sooner or later you will achieve your goal. So... Don’t create a friend zone for yourself with your own hands. Be spontaneous.© Maria Zalesskaya. All rights reserved