From the author: Psychotherapist, member of the professional psychotherapeutic league (Moscow), expert on television programs, sexologist, educational psychologist, NLP master, specialist in the eastern version of neuroprogramming, specialist in personal well-being and family relationships, trainer, coach. The topic of love is probably the most important in a person’s life. Most of us are unloved children. We can, of course, blame our parents for this, but if you look at it, they are often not to blame. They simply could not give us what they themselves did not have. Therefore, in a person’s life such a topic as *lack of love* may arise. I want to approach this problem as a family psychologist and explain to you, dear reader, some current aspects of the problem. For a newborn child, the first year of his life is the most important - any family psychologist will tell you this. Let me clarify that, probably, even a little more - up to one and a half years. The dominant role in the life of a child at this stage belongs to the mother. She is everything to him. Further, from one and a half to 4 years, the father’s figure comes to the fore - he stimulates the child’s competence and determines what kind of leader or follower he will be. This is the most important period in the life of boys. Many men come to me for an individual consultation as a family psychologist who have problems with the dominance circuit, low self-esteem, etc. - since dad could not give the correct male model of behavior, hence the “roots” of many problems. And for a girl, there is often no image of a good, correct father, because of this she may have difficulties in relationships with men. Now you can evaluate yourself - where you “fly”. This is how it happened for my client when, in her early thirties, she began to feel this lack of love, and was able to understand that she was losing a lot when she did not show the required amount of love and did not receive it in return. Love is a paradoxical resource - The more we give, the more we receive. This is what we began to work with. She understood that she did not feel the desired love, in addition, she had a wary attitude towards men. She could not fully open up and express her love. The difficulty was that her parents divorced early, and her “male image” was built on the example of her older brother, who on an unconscious level replaced her father. He did not take into account her opinion, he directed her actions. She had to obey. In connection with the above, she had already “dragged” this model of relationship into her family, where there were frequent fights on the topic: “who is in charge in the family,” a certain competitive moment, as was previously the case with her brother. When we resolved this situation and brought it to a new level of relationship, the client said that now: “my opinion is important and my loved ones understand it and react appropriately.” She added openness and trust to her life resources, which she will now bring to her family. Further, I want to say that the psychogenetic element also contributed its negative component to the topic of lack of love. Family psychologists do not always pay enough attention to this. We came across a generic problem that was passed on to the client - resentment and distancing from men. In their feminine family there was a woman who married “on a dare” to someone she didn’t love, and she carried this negative state not only throughout her life, but also passed it on to her descendants. Having analyzed this aspect, the client felt changes in herself instantly. What I value psychogenetics for is the quick result that comes immediately and forever. We will not go into the details of my work as a family psychologist, I will only say about the result achieved. Working with the client was easy, and we were able to work through this problem completely and completely in 2 hours of an individual consultation. We must give her credit, she was able to analyze her problem state in advance and describe it, which speeded up and made our work easier. I would like to quote the words of Nikola Tesla: “The mind is present at every point in space and can act.