For many, the formulation of the question may seem paradoxical, well, partly this is so, but the point is not in the pursuit of paradoxes, the point is that any phenomena - viewing angles, perspectives vision, positions and relationships - there is always more than one option. So, in this article there are two central theses that we will talk about: 1. other (surrounding) people don’t care about you; 2. this (the fact that they don’t care) is good. For the convenience of the story and so as not to be distracted any further, I will note that, yes, there is an extremely narrow circle of people (usually 3-5 people) who do not give a damn about you, and even then... not everyone and not always. Let's return to the first thesis. When considering it, we will encounter a contradiction that is very disturbing and makes life difficult for many, but in order. First of all - others (people around you) really in the vast majority of cases of everyday life - do not care about you (and everyone else), this is a fact. Not good, not bad, just a fact. As long as they have nothing to share with you, they won’t give a damn. The rhythm and pace of modern cities cuts off everything unnecessary and ineffective from the point of view of the city’s existence. Interpersonal communication, or rather even the ability of people to see each other, falls into such atavisms and anachronisms. A “blind spot” of disregard has formed and become entrenched. In city life, this mechanism has justifications and significant advantages, the main one of which is saving resources (time, internal energy, finances). + it is beneficial for the city as a system if people don’t give a damn about each other, because when people are separated, it’s easier to manage them, because their resistance to influence is low, or even zero. I think we’ve sorted out the evidence base for the thesis. Let’s move on. “Others don’t care about me,” about my feelings, thoughts, actions, desires, words, attitude, etc. How many times in your life have you said this yourself? How many times have you heard from loved ones, friends and acquaintances? But think about this... with what emotional background (with what assessment) did you speak or hear these words? I can’t speak for everyone, but I’ve only ever heard this with one interpretation - negative (negative). That is, the fact that some people don’t give a damn about you is bad, terrible, offensive, painful, etc. In general, I myself once perceived the situation this way, until I saw that this is not the only way to look at the question, but more on this later, but now we’re just approaching the contradiction... And this contradiction is on the surface: on the one hand, a person notices and highlights the state of things through the message “others don’t care about me,” which often causes a lot of worries, but on the other hand, countless thoughts and the actions, feelings and desires of the same person are blocked with the message “what will others think?” or “those around you will judge.” Well, it’s not surprising that there are so many unhappy people and psychosomatic diseases. With such dissonance, it is difficult to be in balance, and even to simply live adequately while maintaining health. Simultaneous thoughts in different directions... a dangerous path, which is precisely why I propose now to move on to the second thesis of the article. So, others don’t care about me. We fixed this “standard” for ourselves. Now let’s take a look at why this is good. And the answer is again on the surface, and in fact it was already sounded a little higher, in the description of the contradiction, namely: when others don’t care about you, it gives freedom. What do I mean? Hear me out: if you accept as a fact that others don’t care about you, then you have a unique chance and resource at your disposal. You can follow your desires, dreams, feelings, ideas without fear of doing something wrong, incorrect, etc. after all, others don’t care about you and your mistakes (if any). Agree, it's simple. It sounds simple, but it’s not so easy to wrap your head around it. The mind is often our enemy, forming attitudes and contradictions, the significance and importance of labels and external assessments. It may not work right away, but change your attitude, try it too, through confirmation.