Domestic violence sounds scary. I immediately imagine screams, swearing, broken dishes, bruises, torn clothes... But I know for sure that violence has another side. This side is quiet, unnoticed, and all are very decent people... Nobody screams... What Is this indecent?! Doesn't hit...Why is this unacceptable?! It’s the quiet side that corrodes your ideas in small drops, undermines your boundaries with a nail file, eats poisonous attitudes into your brain, “You never know what you want?! First you need to think about your parents, and then about yourself,” “Shame on you, you don’t want to help your mom, She's tired!" etc. These droplets are very clearly manifested in the example of parents with teenagers. Teenagers are already different, you need to negotiate with them, they defend their territory, it is important to listen to their opinion, and here, especially, this is visible...Parents begin to burst out with ideas. I will give some of them: Idea 1. “You don’t need to close the door to the room, it’s important that the door is always open. Otherwise, who knows what he’s doing there?!” And the boy is 17 years old, lives alone with his mother, and it’s true that he can do a lot of different things in the room. And so, he always lives in full view of his mother.... Idea 2. “We went to help grandma and you are with us, we won’t go alone.” Mom and dad are not very willing to go to help their mother-in-law at the dacha, they go because they have to, they can’t say no, they have to go every year and help pick tomatoes. Then take them home, put them on the floor and wait for them to turn from green to red, then throw away half the tomatoes, because no one can eat that much. And this poor teenager is simply presented with the fact that we are going on Sunday. No one even warns him in advance, doesn’t ask him whether he can or not... "And you’re not ashamed to go to your grandmother with such a face... Well, we’re the only ones who have to pick these tomatoes, get used to adult life." Idea 3. “You never know what she doesn’t like, I’m used to it.” A 15-year-old girl asks her mother not to call her “Bunny”...in response, “Bunny, you just don’t like your mother, but your mother has done so much for you.”. .I still have these ideas for a book, you can just write and write...I think this is not the last post...I think you have your own bits of domestic violence, quiet and corrosive? I will be glad if you share.