From the author: Comments are possible only within the framework of the discussion of the article. Yesterday, a muscle stretching session turned into a session on removing “landmine stretch marks” in the internal state. We threw butterflies and splits, sat on the floor opposite each other and talked for almost an hour. My client is a fragile, sweet girl of 21 years old. They said that when a child is born as a function that must solve some parental internal problem, then the place and position of the child in such a family system is extremely sad, and sometimes tragic. And childhood turns from the “brightest period of life” into the most difficult stage. A stage, precisely in the prison sense, which one must go through and remain, albeit crippled, but alive. We talked about teenage suicides. The fact that a person doesn’t want to live, he doesn’t want to live exactly the way he lives now. And there is no clearing visible. And the only light is in the window, which can become an exit. They said that there is no generally accepted practice of seeking psychological help and support, even free of charge. There is no such culture - to take care of yourself, to help yourself. It’s such a shame to be weak and helpless. You have to be able to do everything, handle it yourself, and if it breaks or is about to crack with a crunch, then it’s your own fault, your problems. Often, when a child’s function fails and does not live up to expectations, the parent threatens him with a “psychologist”. “Advanced” people can even ask the child if he would like to go to a specialist and decide and do something together with him. It often sounds like “I’ll pay, but I personally don’t want and won’t participate in this, I’m fine, the child is not what I need. Take the money and save me from these problems.” I am sure that if a parent, faced with difficulties in life and relationships with a child, ran headlong to a specialist to work with Himself, learn to see his role and responsibility for “failures” in the “children-parents” system, then the teenager at some point it is necessary to join out of feelings of solidarity with the system and gratitude for truly caring for him. But, horrifyingly, the reality is that children are responsible for the stability and health of the family. And often with Life. Child-parent relationships: difficulties, contradictions, conflicts. Personal and Skype counseling.