Many of us are familiar with the feeling of envy. It’s not joy for other people’s successes and achievements, but envy, when you look at a person and don’t understand: how was he able to achieve something with his qualities? He is (seemingly) stupider/uglier/lazier/less educated than me, but everything in his life is going so well and well. Let's try to figure out what envy is, where it comes from and how to deal with it. As you know: we all come from childhood. It is in childhood that behavioral patterns are laid down that control our unconscious in adulthood. We absorb with mother's milk how and what we should do or what we should not do. It is in childhood that we internalize an idea of ​​ourselves that may be completely different from us in the future and have nothing to do with the real us, but our unconscious so firmly records the scripts that were instilled in us in childhood that we automatically continue to repeat them throughout our entire life. life, sometimes without even noticing it. When a child grows up in maternal love and care, then from childhood he understands that he is “okay”. Regardless of whether he is handsome or not, smart or not, successful or mediocre. The child gains a sense of security in the world, believing that the world can give him everything he needs. If a child experiences a lack of warmth and care from childhood, then his basic needs are not covered, and accordingly, this causes mental pain, which over time transforms into envy: I’m not good enough to have something, to be someone, to want something more for yourself. And those people who allow themselves the courage to be who they want, do what they want, want more and better for themselves and their lives and get it - they cause this toxic feeling - ENVY. Now that we understand where it comes from envy, let's think about how to deal with it? And is it worth it? Firstly, when you feel an acute feeling of envy towards someone, try to analyze what exactly you envy? For example: you are envious of photos you see of a friend doing yoga and going to a massage. Listen, what exactly do you need? The same yoga classes and massage visits, or do you dream of a beautiful figure and a healthy body? If the second, try to figure out in what ways available to you right now you can achieve this and look as beautiful as the person you envy. The second step is to write down on a piece of paper what things or actions make you envious? Why is this exactly what you envy? Write down everything that comes to your mind. Now re-read everything that you wrote and look at these things from a different angle: what of what I wrote down can I do for myself? What actions can I take to turn envy into my dream? Write a step-by-step action plan to realize your dream. Try to approach this realistically: without belittling your merits, but at the same time without driving yourself into strict limits, so as not to be upset because you were unable to fulfill your plans on time. The most important result in the fight against envy is the desire to turn envy into your dream! Each of us has sufficient internal resources to have an external resource. But to have exactly the resource that we need. To do this, you need to know yourself very well, your needs and be able to distinguish false shoulds from your true desires! I wish you good luck in the fight against envy and will be happy to help you with this!