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I'm not a robot

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Privacy - Terms

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After the previous publication, where I talked about feelings of guilt, I received this question. “I make excuses all the time. How to stop?” And in my work with clients, I encountered similar difficulties. The situation usually unfolds as follows: a person blames himself for a mistake, scolds himself, then makes excuses, and then scolds himself for making excuses. And it turns out to be a vicious circle. How to stop making excuses? Just understand that your excuses will not benefit anyone, neither you nor the one to whom you are making excuses. Nobody needs them simply because they do not give anything to correct a mistake or change the situation for the better. I will give an example from personal experience. I once worked in a large company where many processes were strictly regulated. Once I asked my colleague to transfer an invoice to the accounting department for payment, because according to the regulations, only she could transfer invoices from our entire department. Several days passed, and I found out that the invoice had not been paid and had not been received by the accounting department at all. I asked: “Did you send my invoice to the accounting department?” And I received the answer: “No, I didn’t send it. Sorry, I didn’t see your letter, it’s hanging unread.” This answer caused me bewilderment and irritation, because it contains excuses, there is an explanation why something was not done, but it is not clear whether the invoice has been sent now or not. The purpose of the question was not to look for those to blame and not to poke one’s nose at mistakes. We are all human, we all make mistakes. Anyone can forget or confuse something. The result is important here - the invoice is transferred to the accounting department for payment. That's it! Remember, the result is always important. When you make excuses, blame yourself, it seems to you that this is enough. No. Excuses often only cause irritation. No one cares WHY you didn't do something. What matters is WHAT you did to correct the error. The result is important. In general, if you have made some mistake, then use this simple algorithm: 1. Admit your mistake.2. Apologize if necessary.3. Do something to correct the error. That's it! There is no need for excuses. Sign up for a consultation with me and we will sort out everything that worries you.

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