The holiday called “The Day of Family, Love and Fidelity” was approaching. And at work I was tasked with preparing for a conference with the main theme “Family. Oh, how good it is!” And the first question I heard inside myself was, “What is THIS good?” Because the ups and downs of my own family relationships immediately arose in my memory, and many cases simply from the life and practice of a psychologist. Yes... First of all, for some reason, I remember difficulties in marriage and everything that makes two once close people strangers, and sometimes openly angry with each other. Only love truly brings them together. We can easily confuse it with falling in love, which disappears so quickly, leaving behind the pain of loss and disappointment. The loss is not even of a person who just yesterday was, as it seemed, the closest and dearest, but of that feeling of fullness, inspiration and happiness that filled to the brim. On what reefs does the ship of love break? Plunging a recently happy married couple into an abyss of irritation, or even just boredom and despondency. I think disappointment is the key word. Disappointment is like a hole in the bottom where water pours in, threatening to sink the beautiful ship called “Family”. And this hole is larger and more dangerous, the more charm there was at the dating stage. The more of his fantasy desires a man has connected with the image of his potential chosen one: she must be the way I want... And the more of her illusions a woman has placed on the “fragile shoulders” of her chosen one: he simply must comply... We often miss these expectations and fantasies the most important thing: do I feel warm with him (her) next to me? Unfortunately, more often an irritated voice is heard inside: “What the hell, he (she) doesn’t meet my expectations?” What needs to be done to prevent this discrepancy from becoming destructive? If you are interested in this topic and have thoughts you would like to share, please respond. I will be glad!