Why do we get tired? It seems like everything is the same as always, the same things, the same stress, it even happens that you do something even less, have more time for rest, but you feel overwhelmed, have no energy at all, apathy, etc. Let's look at several reasons for this condition. But first, let’s think about what, on the contrary, gives us strength, energy, a good mood to do something, to do some things easily, naturally? Of course, we can say with confidence that if a person does what he loves, then everything is “on fire” for him, his work is “progressing,” as people say. It’s true, it’s great happiness, good luck, if a person finds something he likes that coincides with his inner feeling when a person is in his place. And, naturally, the first advice to all the “tired” will be this: Find yourself a favorite activity, an activity “to your liking.” And immediately a provocative example. A young guy, a high school student, complains of constant fatigue, physical ailment (back hurts, it’s hard to stand for a long time. The guy is a very active person, at school he organizes events, performs in the theater. He really likes his work, but every time everything is given to him with difficulty, and even favorite activities become a burden, there is not enough strength, there is no mood. It would seem that the young man is doing what he loves, with inspiration, with all his soul. Why is fatigue and physical ailment important for a teenager during this period? to the question: “Who am I?”, to form a portrait of yourself, to find out what is special about it, what is unique, what is different from others. And what is the task of parents to help a teenager, a young man with self-determination? , suggest what traits and qualities of character he has that help him achieve success and get results from his activities. This is all good, but what to do when the parents are not up to it (there are different reasons). What should a young man do, how can he cope with fatigue and physical ailment? Of course, he lacks praise and support from his parents. And with his condition, he seems to “say” to his parents: “Do you see what is happening to me? Help me". The mistake is that we often expect others to change, as in this case. But – we can expect (and not wait) for parents to change, to our own detriment and to the detriment of our health. We can try to fix the situation ourselves. How? Firstly, we can advise our hero to rely on the opinion and support of his friends, teachers, who undoubtedly see and note the results of his activities. Secondly, the young man is already old enough to notice something new in himself, adding to his portrait. When we encounter a state of fatigue, the most important thing is to determine what urgent human need is not being satisfied during this period of life, what is missing - care, attention, praise, a sense of one’s worth and importance. Let's consider another case, from the life of the spouses. A young woman, full of strength and health, complains: “My husband and I have been married for several years, we have a small child. In my free time I do what I love. But all the time I feel like I don’t have enough physical and moral strength, no energy, no inspiration, little motivation to do anything. My husband also “adds fuel to the fire”: he constantly criticizes me, says that I am incapable of anything. My husband works and always comes home tired and irritated. I don’t understand why this is happening, where has our enthusiasm gone, why are we not in the mood? After all, we are still young, but what will happen next?” Again we encounter a situation where everything seems to be fine - an interesting job, a beloved husband and child. Why fatigue? And what kind of motivation are we talking about? What does a young wife lack? Why is your husband annoyed? Let's ask the question, as in the first example - what need of the spouses in marriage is not satisfied? What are they missing? Let's assume that, just likeand the young man from the first example, the young spouses lack each other’s support, gratitude, and compliments. Such a story can happen when they were deprived of the praise of their parents as children. Then they, as it were, deliberately create and reproduce in the family the same situation as they had in childhood - parents criticized, children were offended, withdrawn into themselves. And now, when this happens, they, as in childhood, expect that “parents” will behave differently, stop criticizing them and start praising them. In fact, the solution to the problem is not to correct the parents, but to stop being offended and, as in the first case, to try to correct the situation ourselves, to begin to react differently, thereby freeing the partner from the role of “critic.” What inspires us in marriage, what gives us the strength to cope with any situation? Of course, the result. If we feel that everything is not in vain, if we feel that our efforts are changing, improving, we gain even more strength and energy. What happens to our spouses? They do not feel the return, the value of each other. Perhaps they are both not used to praising, thanking, or admiring each other. A woman underestimates herself, and her husband only “adds fuel to the fire”, mainly by criticizing her. But the husband also gets tired and irritated. Does this mean that he also expects praise from his wife for his contribution to the family? And again we see what the spouses’ mistake is - they expect changes from each other, they don’t wait, they are offended, irritated, as a result, as the people say: “But things are still there.” Yes, someone must be the first to start correcting the situation, to behave differently. For example, the wife should be the first to start praising her husband - what a caring, master, commander, breadwinner he is, etc., tell the child what a wonderful dad we have (of course, so that dad can hear)... Share with your husband your achievements for day - what successes the child has, what he has learned, etc., with his own, albeit small, successes in his business, in the household. We need to make him feel that it’s not in vain that he goes to work and earns money. The point is to convey to the spouse that it is thanks to him that his wife and children have success. Sometimes spouses believe that they achieve success not because of, but in spite of their partner. But this is not true. In our case, a wife can do what she loves, a child, only because her husband, earning money and providing for his family, allows her to do so. Often women do not appreciate this; for some reason they do not want their husband to feel his importance and significance. But by praising her husband, the wife will only benefit. For the sake of his wife’s praise, the husband is ready to earn even more money, even to do something he doesn’t like. He “grows wings”, strength and energy appear. Well, my husband and I figured out how to make him happy with his wife and children, so that he has the strength and energy to run to work and earn money with enthusiasm. What about your wife? Of course, in response, she would like to hear praise addressed to her from her husband. But suddenly she chose a husband who only knows how to criticize and is not at all used to praising (and we suspect that perhaps this is exactly how things were with “praise” in her parental family; she once unsuccessfully waited for praise from her parents, and now he continues to expect this from his husband)? It's OK! There is a way out of this situation. You praised your husband and immediately added - what a wonderful wife you have! Handles everything! Smart and beautiful! There is no need to skimp on praise addressed to you, even if your husband only has time to assent. This is what will give the spouses strength, mood, inspiration, and strengthen their marital relationship! And, undoubtedly, it will instill in them the value of themselves, no matter what the circumstances. The parable of the wise wife tells about such a situation in the family: One smart woman, whose husband could not devote time to her and always remained blind to her beauty, decided to help herself. One evening she moved closer to her husband, who was buried in his books. “Doesn’t my hair look like gold?” - she began. Without looking up from her books, she