Recently I had a dialogue. Nothing special - mom's conversations, what's going on with whom and how, and at the end my interlocutor says such a clearly obvious phrase - children, this is the main thing in life... But wait, this is not so! Of course, during pregnancy, childbirth, the first months of a child’s life, yes, the child is a priority, the woman performs a very specific functional role. Under certain favorable conditions, this role for a woman can turn out to be very pleasant, meditative and even healing, this is true. But this same role gives women another side of motherhood - a huge number of new anxieties, a meeting with the finiteness of their own resources, both physical and mental, with their own capabilities and limitations, fatigue and helplessness. And that's not even the most important thing. Motherhood is one of the stages in a woman’s life. Important, like any other. We live in a society where exclusive attention is paid to motherhood to the detriment of all other female meanings, roles and needs. I am talking now about our Russian, post-Soviet space. Probably, any woman sooner or later begins to experience varying degrees of pressure from her environment. Most often it's early. Most often strong. Most often from the same women - mothers. When our parents gave birth, and our parents were born, it was necessary to intensively replenish the ranks of citizens of the coolest country in the whole world. The country ended, but the idea remained alive. Moreover, she lives with enviable strength. One of my friends’ mothers, in yet another “unobtrusive” conversation about where the much-coveted grandchildren were, in response to quite natural objections, said in her hearts, “then you give birth and give it to me, and do whatever you want”... although she is a completely reasonable woman, of sound mind and sober memory. And I'm sure there are many of them. And so we live like this, beautiful, looking for some of our own meanings in life, studying our inner world and needs, and from the outside, the further, the stronger - give birth, give birth, give birth... This kind of pressure will drive anyone to white heat, There is no way to endure this for long. It’s good if this idea is wonderfully compared with the inner needs of a woman - the man is suitable, and the conditions are in the best possible way... but this, we understand, does not happen very often. So it turns out that, without having time to really get to know our inner world, we give birth to new people. And just as we and our needs were ignored, we begin to ignore the needs of these little people. All. The circle is closed. And then these children grow up. For a woman who has endowed a child with the power of meaning in a mother’s life, this is a disaster. He has grown up, but what next? It's good to have several children. But several children also grow up sooner or later. And then what? Then such women begin to press on their daughters - give birth, give it to me. It’s as if a child is a bargaining chip, and we live in the days of serfdom, when human life had a very specific value... So that’s what I’m talking about. About how motherhood is wonderful. It fills, opens up new facets of life, inspires. But this is not the most important thing. Yes, and there is none - the most important thing. Each stage is important to one degree or another. It is important to find your meanings, interests, joys, to find out who I am and what I am like, to create those very favorable conditions when all life will be a joy, with all its stages and components. Each of us will have to look for them ourselves, but how interesting and exciting this journey can be, and helpers along this path are encountered more and more often. And when they are found - these meanings, what gives joy and inspires, then we will all be happy.