From the author: The basics of family constellations. To help my clients. I thank my system constellation teacher M.G. Burnyasheva. Once a Man and a Woman met, fell in love with each other, and she appeared - their little Miracle - Daughter. At the moment when the Daughter’s life began, the Man and Woman (and more often also the Husband and Wife) became Dad and Mom - her, her Daughters, and most importantly - forever. Mother carried her Daughter for nine long months. At this time, Dad was called upon to protect and take care of both Mom and baby daughter. And so, Mom gave birth to a Daughter - a little blood baby appeared! The light around the newborn Daughter is Mom. Mom is everything. Warmth, food, care, protection, affection - and most importantly, love. It is Mom’s love that is important for the little Daughter to be filled with it for life. And the Daughter takes, takes, takes love from Mom with all the strength of her tiny heart and soul. It is filled with resources, like a fruit under the rays of the gentle sun. From birth until about 3 years old, the daughter gains love and feminine strength from her mother. She grows. And he is less dependent on Mom. And - takes a step! Towards Dad. The daughter bravely leaves her mother and “moves” towards her father, making the first basic movement between the “poles” of “Mom” and “Dad”. The age of “transition” to the Pope is 3-7 years in a “complete family” and somewhat longer in a “single-parent” family. A Daughter sometimes goes to Dad longer than a Son - this is her path. Once near Dad, the Daughter is saturated with his resources, she takes from him care, support, protection, and, of course, fatherly love. The more love the Daughter receives from Dad during this period, the more secure she becomes in relationships with other people. They say that if Mom’s love brings you into Life, then Dad’s love brings you into people. With the onset of puberty, the Daughter again takes a step away from Dad to Mom. This occurs between the ages of 8 and 18 years. Now Mom is needed again so that she can learn to be a Woman next to her. With Dad next to her, there is no longer a place for a daughter growing into a Woman. The daughter sometimes has difficulty tearing herself away from Dad, and Mom helps her with this. Mom and Daughter now have a lot in common - they are both Women. During the period of adulthood, which usually lasts from 18 to 21 years, the Daughter is already filled with resources from Mom and Dad, she has taken everything that she could take from her Parents, and there is no longer any need to be near. The daughter is “pushed” into an independent position. She now has her own Island of Life or Home, which she will have to equip, using what she received from her Parents. From this position, the Daughter sees both Dad and Mom and can thank them for what they were able to give her while she was small. and at the same time, it is unnecessary and there is no time to stare at your parents for a long time - you need to build your life and look into the Future. Dad and Mom, whatever one may say, remained behind the Adult Daughter’s back. There is, of course, a temptation to return to your parents again and try to beg for more good things for yourself, but how not to stay there, becoming little again! Oh-oh! And only having built her Life, having learned not only to take, but also to create and give resources, does the Daughter become autonomous, free, like ships at sea, so free that she can now come to Dad and Mom, without the risk of remaining a little girl, but always remaining a Daughter. This is the Path a Daughter goes through with Mom and Dad as she grows up. Is her path always as smooth and sweet as it is written here? No. As on any Road (especially in our country), there are bumps and dips on it, such that it is absolutely impossible to go further, and the Path can be confusing, so that you can’t figure it out without help. I will talk about this in the following articles. Good for you!