There are no bad feelings in the world, only unpleasant ones. The universe is perfect. Everything that exists in it is necessary and fulfills its function. If we talk about unpleasant feelings, then the idea that they are bad and wrong appears in the process of education and further interaction of people within the framework of some kind of relationship - friendly, romantic, work, etc. We, as a species, have instincts that help us sense danger. Thanks to them, we know where ours are and where the strangers are. And when we understand that our own are those who love us and will not harm us, we relax and do not expect a catch. But unfortunately, statistics show that people who commit violence of any kind usually know the victims well, and sometimes these are the people closest to them. And violence is often presented as love, or the rapist keeps the victim in fear of even more violence. When instincts say one thing, and a close/significant/authoritative person says another, a problem arises - who to believe. If to ourselves, then it means that our loved one wants to harm us, and if we believe the one who hurts us, then we cannot trust ourselves, our feelings, sensations, intuitions. For the sake of maintaining relationships, people often choose not themselves. In childhood, this may be necessary to do in order to survive, but in adulthood it does not work out any other way, because there is no experience of taking care of oneself. And no matter how much you want to build a happy relationship based on love, respect and trust, it doesn’t work out. By suppressing fear, disgust, anger, powerlessness and shame, they try to live as if everything is fine. This alienation of negative feelings leads to the fact that positive feelings cannot be fully experienced either. Just as there is no day without night, so joy cannot be complete without the opportunity to experience sadness, love without expressing displeasure, joy without indignation, etc. If a person does not trust his feelings and sensations, then he gets used to observing and adapting to the situation and behavior of other people - after all, from the outside it is clearer what he should experience and how to react. He gives power over himself to other people and expects that someone will notice the real him, his real feelings and allow them to be shown. People who do not trust their feelings, are in dire need of others, very quickly get close to them and idealize them, considering themselves unworthy. Because they are used to suppressing their feelings, they do not notice when others abuse their trust and violate their boundaries. It’s as if this negative experience is erased from them, and they open up again and again to those who are not worthy of their trust. They say that they found the ideal friend, boss, lover, etc., and that with no one there was such mutual understanding and ease as with him. They are afraid to frighten away this feeling of happiness and believe that it will always be like this now. But none of us are perfect, and sooner or later, the other one hurts them, whether on purpose or by accident - it doesn’t matter at all. And instead of seeing reality, such people begin to look for reasons in themselves. “There must be something wrong with me!” - such people scroll over and over again in their heads - “I need to become better and try harder.” Once again, they end up in unsuitable relationships or stay in unfavorable conditions for too long, becoming convinced that they cannot be loved for who they are. But, fortunately, this is not the case. Each of us is unique and beautiful, and no one should adjust, remain silent and force themselves for the sake of a relationship. Trying to find someone who will love and understand us, we forget about ourselves - the attitude that we cannot trust ourselves is firmly imprinted in our consciousness and subconscious. And it is precisely this that needs to be changed and understood why trust was lost, how a person came to the conclusion that relationships are more valuable than himself. And begin to get to know yourself again, recognizing yourself as you are. Take your time, look carefully and give yourself as much time as you need to cry and laugh, be afraid and brag, and just be. All feelings are important, without