From the author: BEFORE and AFTER... these words are heard very often during consultations. And what's behind them? Pain or Joy? Despair or Victory? Everyone chooses how to treat it and what to call it. Each of us has enough life situations after which life is divided into two stages. Most often we refer to this as Before and After. What happened BEFORE is described as a negative experience or event, and what happened AFTER is described as positive. But this is not always the case, in some situations it’s the other way around. Considering my professional and life experience, I can say that a similar description of the situation often comes from the lips of my beloved clients and friends (I think it’s the same with you). It is in this simple way that they designate the events of their lives. Listening to these stories, you understand that no matter what happens in life, positive events always alternate with less pleasant ones. Sometimes you are surprised how often such events change; you involuntarily create an association with a striped zebra - white stripe, black stripe. But is this bad? I think this is wonderful and even excellent! After all, only after going through the prism of failure, problem or even tragedy, many people turn on the mechanism of awareness, and sometimes re-awareness of what is happening to them. Re-awareness that the time has come to change something in your life, or it’s time to change your attitude towards something. On this score, I remembered the wonderful parable “Falling and Rising”: One student asked his Sufi mentor: - Teacher, what would you said if he knew about my fall? - Get up! - And next time? - Get up again! - And how long can this continue - keep falling and rising? - While you live. Let's look in detail at the positive aspects of the BLACK STRIP of your life: Firstly, if you are in an unpleasant situation for the first time , then check for yourself everything that your loved ones or acquaintances told you about similar cases - you will receive KNOWLEDGE that you did not want to receive before; Secondly, if you find yourself in the same unpleasant situation for the second time, you can already use or apply in practice, KNOWLEDGE acquired for the first time is EXPERIENCE; Thirdly, the acquired Knowledge and Experience should already form a model of behavior that will help you avoid a similar situation in the future - this is SKILL; Fourthly, usually after the Knowledge has been formed, Experience gained is Skill; you understand that the situation was not as scary and terrible as we imagined it to be. What is most important, after all this we begin to hear and listen to our loved ones, who have repeatedly told us: “Don’t drink from the hoof, you’ll become a Little Goat” (sorry for quoting the fairy tale). Fifthly, when the situation has no way out (as it seems to us ), we begin to look for someone who could help cope with it. Often this turns out to be a friend or girlfriend, sometimes a clergyman, and sometimes a psychologist. This situation reminds me of the moment when you have a very long and severe toothache, but you just can’t overcome the fear of making an appointment with the dentist. Sometimes, one of your loved ones almost forcibly makes an appointment with the dentist and takes you by the hand to the dental clinic. And only after the dentist solves your problem, a very clear BEFORE and AFTER state appears. You definitely already have something to compare with and something to think about. Sixthly, everything falls into place, and we understand that each specialist must solve his range of problems: the car breaks down - we go to the mechanic; If your tooth hurts, go to the dentist; we ran out of food - we buy it in the store, etc. And as soon as some specialist solved our problem, we immediately analyze our new condition in comparison with the previous one: - BEFORE I got to this mechanic, my car roared like the beast, and AFTER - it rides softly and does not buzz, etc. In my practice, to understand the fact BEFORE and AFTER, I use a technique under the same name. It helps you visualize your feelings BEFORE and AFTER. Please do not judge some of the drawings strictly, since the artistic abilities of all people are different, and therefore the technique.